cry

Chapter 6: Toothpaste Ice Cream

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-y/n

(Play Only in My Dreams by The Marias)

I sit in my car in the parking lot of the diner, the spot farthest from the entrance.

I twist my key out of the ignition of my car, turning it off. The hum of the motor came to a halt. My keys jingle as I wrap my Paradis lanyard around my hand.

It was quiet. The only sounds audible were the passing of cars every few minutes on the road next to the diner and the occasional breeze that would rattle the leaves on the trees.

I grab my phone and look out my window as I put my hand on my door handle, preparing to step out and into the diner.

I keep my hand on my door handle as the view of the vast sky out of the window caught all of my attention.

The sky was painted a vanilla color as the blue from the day starts fading to orange. The clouds were a mixture of pink and orange and resembled cotton candy. It was a beautiful sunset tonight. The prettiest one I've seen in a while. It reminds me of the one sunset from that night.

Peeling my eyes off the sky I feel my phone vibrate in my hand. I feel my heart drop to my stomach, again. It could probably be Reiner finally answering me.

I look at my cracked phone and see it's a text from some random phone number asking me to click on a link. I roll my eyes and sigh as I sit back in my cushioned seat.

I still haven't heard from Reiner and it made me only more anxious by the minute. I even passed the high school on the way here because I was just that worried.

His pickup truck was still in that fucking parking lot.

He definitely didn't meet with a teacher then in that case. All teachers are gone by 6:00. When I drove past the school it was 6:26.

Him still not answering me only caused me to get more worried, along with his car still in the parking lot. I don't know where he could be. I'm not like a crazy girlfriend or anything, I'm just so used to him telling me where he'd be or what he's doing like every twenty minutes.

He's been acting so fucking weird. I don't know what was going on with him today but whatever it is he better speak up about it or keep it to himself. If he's anything like he was today tomorrow as well, then I wouldn't be able to handle it as calmly as I did.

I'm not his emotional punching bag or whatever. I'm his girlfriend. I need to be treated like one.

I pull my hand off the door handle and unlock my phone to text him again. I would just try calling him again but if I hear that stupid voicemail for a second time, I'd really break my phone. I can't afford that right now.

I just send him a quick "are you okay" and for him to text or call me as soon as he sees my messages.

It's getting irritating as much as it's also anxiety-inducing. I don't like playing this guessing and waiting game.

I lock my phone again and lean back in my seat. I needed a moment before I went inside. This whole Reiner thing is making me sick from how frustrating it is.

I know I say a lot of things about him but nonetheless, I still love him a lot. I really don't understand why I love him half the time but I do and it's exhausting.

I cover my face with my hands and rub my eyes with my palms. I slide my hands to hold the back of my neck as I take another deep breath.

I'm so tired. All of the time. It's unbelievable that I even convinced myself going out would be a good idea. I haven't seen Mikasa or Sasha outside of school in a while, so this will be fun and refreshing.