Dirty Mistakes

Chapter six

"Nice place." Sarah says when she walks in the house.

"Thanks." I smile.

She joins me on the couch, crossing her legs and tucking her hair behind her ears.

"So what's up?" I ask.

"I wanted to talk to you about Rafe." She says and I sigh.

"Um what about him?" I ask.

"I just wanted to tell you some things about him before he tries to get in your pants."

She mustn't know about last night. I feel somewhat guilty here, I should tell her he was already in my pants but I want to know what she has to say about him.

"Okay." I say.

"He's dangerous."

Dangerous? I didn't get that vibe from him. I mean the first time I met him he was clearly angry and beat up but that could happen to anybody.

"Dangerous how?"

"He's addicted to drugs, he carries a gun around like it's a toy. He shot one of the sheriffs last year."

I'm unsure of what to say. I'm definitely shocked.

"He shot someone?"

"Yeah." She nods. "It was a fucked up situation. He did it to protect our dad."

"Why?"

"That's a story for another time." She sighs. "I just wanted to let you know that he isn't the person he may seem to be. All these girls are throwing themselves on him everyday because he's a 'bad boy' but he's just plain stupid. He needs help, a lot of it and my dad holds him back."

"Wow, okay. Thanks for telling me." I say. I swallow the large lump in my throat.

"He's so easy to fall for. I'm just tired of cleaning up all his messes. You're a sweet girl and I don't want him to hurt you."

"Thank you." I say, forcing a smile.

"If he ever does anything to you, please tell me."

"I will." I nod.

This should be scaring me right? I should be terrified to look in Rafe's direction but I'm not. The only emotion I am feeling right now is sadness. Sadness because Sarah doesn't want me near Rafe. I want to be near Rafe, but why? Clearly he needs psychological help, he does not seem very trustworthy, he shot somebody, he's addicted to drugs... why am I still attracted to him?

"I promise you he wouldn't be like the other guys you've been with." She says.

"I wouldn't know, I haven't been with anyone before."

"Like you haven't had sex before?"

"Nope." I say.

"Well bitch, we gotta find you some dick." She laughs and all I can do it force a grin.

***

Another day goes by without seeing Rafe. I'm glad I don't have his phone number because I don't think I would have much self control. I would be at his house right now if Sarah wasn't there. I have so many questions that I'm terrified to ask. I don't want him to get angry with me. I didn't think he would hurt me but now I'm not so sure.

After sulking on my couch for another thirty minutes, I decide to get myself ready to meet the group. Apparently we are going to a beach fire then staying at Sarah's for the night.

I make sure I have everything in my bag before leaving the house. On the walk there, I text my mom to let her know I'm staying at Sarah's house tonight. It makes her happy knowing that I've made a few friends here. She was worried I was going to be a depressed house worm like I was in Washington.