Mr. Perfect

One

Amelia

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage." – Lao Tzu

In poetry, books, movies, paintings, music, and basically everything - there is love presented.

I want to be loved. I want to feel strong and courageous.

Growing up I didn't see my parents love and cherish each other, no, I saw arguments, my mother saying she regrets the day she'd met my father, the day she had me. But it doesn't really hurt as bad as it used to.

My best friend, Jake, he found real love – went on a blind date and just fell in love with his date. He tried to set me up on a blind date, since I'm "desperately looking for love." As Jake said, and I am! But he sets me up with so many guys just so I don't bother him and his boyfriend anymore. I don't like the guys he makes me meet, they talk way too much. No, brag is the word.

Jake says blind dating is the best way to find real love. But on the other hand, my father says, "You'll know real love when you meet it." At first, it didn't make sense... and now, it still doesn't.

Does he mean love at first sight? I asked him too many times, but he never answered.

My mother says, "God will send you real love." I believe that too, she told me that the last time I visited her... we never really get along since she hates me. I think it's because I'm biologically a part of my dad, or it's because I look nothing like her, so she sees my dad's face in me. At the end of the day, I have his dimples, his curly brown hair – thank God it's not blonde, no offence to my mom and the blondies – but I wish I had my mother's blue eyes.

I thought history class was going to be boring but turns out it's quite the opposite. The talk of Lao Tzu is making me curious. About the love quotes, of course.

"Love is a decision, not an emotion." The old history professor said, and I scoffed, he stared at me and his wrinkly eyes had more wrinkles as he smiled.

"Miss Collins, is there something you'd like to say?"

"Love isn't a decision." He raised a grey eyebrow at me, "Could you elaborate, Miss Collins?" I stood up.

"You don't fall in love with someone because you decided to, no, that's nonsense. It's because you can't help but think of that one person, you choose to ignore all their flaws because you want to see them as perfect. love is an emotion, it's a hormone, like happiness, sadness, or fear... if you're depressed you can't just decide that you're happy and move on. And same goes for love." I explain.

He laughs and shakes his head pointing a finger at me "I like the way you think, Collins." I smiled lazily and sat back on my chair, as he continued with his Lao Tzu talk.

I was no longer interested in the Laozi which made the lecture uninteresting again – he did have some nice life quotes though, but as I said, I wasn't interested anymore.

The half-dead students were suddenly alive again as the professor dismissed us.

I grabbed a pizza box walking to our usual table, Jake was sitting there with Olivia. "Can I ask for a favor?" I'm pretty sure they know what I'm about to ask, or at least Jake knows. They both stared at me with their green eyes, "No." I rested my chin on my palms and blinked with puppy eyes "Please..." Olivia sighed, I smiled in victory knowing I could get her to do whatever I want with my puppy eyes. "Did you forget to get your clothes from the dry-cleaning place?" oh, shoot! I totally forgot about those, I was asking them to accompany me while grocery shopping.

I smiled awkwardly, "Yeah... and grocery shop with me." Jake laughed rolling his head back, while Olivia just shook her head in disbelief. "We can't, Olivia and I are going to that party, remember?" I groaned, I forgot about their party. "Fine, I guess I'll have to go alone then." Olivia's lips curved, "Or... we could get them tomorrow, and you can come to the party." She said in a questioning tone, Jake nodded excitedly, and I shook my head, "Thank you, but no." I hate parties. I mean what's the point of going to one knowing you'll probably get sexually assaulted, or drugged, or super drunk – and that would lead to rape. No thank you.