Only a Heartbeat Away

Chapter 12

Harry stirred against Louis, slowly stretched and let out a silent yawn, he let go of Louis' hand that he held on too and rolled over, his head now on Louis chest listening to his heartbeat and feeling Louis' chest rise and fall beneath his head. Harry smiled and hugged Louis tighter. Harry hummed contently until his bladder had something to say so he yet again gingerly moved off louis' chest and went to the bathroom. Louis feeling the bed dip as Harry returned from relieving himself, work up with a start. Harry gently shushed him without words. Green looked lovingly into blue.

"Hey sweetie. How are you feeling?" Harry pulled out Louis' phone (as Sally still had custody of his) and opened notes choosing to type out his response to Lou.

"Feeling a lot better. Throat still hurts and my bones still ache though but I no longer  feel nauseous, dizzy, on the edge of an asthma attack and I think the fever has broken."

"That's great news baby. I will talk to the lads later to discuss who is taking over your parts."

"I still want to be on stage." Louis sighed heavily

"Fine but you make one noise and I give the lads permission to kick you."

"Thanks babe. By the way how are you?" Louis looked at Harry in confusion and shrugged

"I'm fine sweetheart."

"That is not what I meant. You went dark for a hot minute, and I know how draining that can be on you and what that does to you. Please Boo-bear answer the question honestly. How are you really?" Louis sighed and started to play with Harry's hair as he considered the question, he had a simple reply for Niall when he asked it, but now Louis seems to be clawing for an answer

"To be perfectly honest my love, I'm fookin' pissed off with the way Sally removed you from me care, I'm fookin' infuriated with myself for not protectin' you as I promised in our vowels and I'm fookin' monk on at the lengths this fookin' management will go through to keep us apart." Still playing with Harry's hair Louis continued, "I'm just mardy and I'm ready to kick off with the next moron that walks through that door." Harry winced at the Donny slang knowing when Louis starts going native it really shows how pissed off he is, but before Harry could do anything it was like the flood gates were open and it was cracked. "And I can't seem to get over the fact that she locked you on a bus that has absolutely nothing on it. You know what I mean. Nothing. You could of fookin' died and she would not have cared as long as you weren't near me. I... Harry you know I love you dearly and I care about you so much but the pressure of playing someone I'm supposed to be and the pressure of keeping you safe is starting to get too much and we're too young to have this amount on us. Always having to sing something poppy on the same four bloody cords. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm not fearless, I am completely defenceless. In this reality tell me what to do Harry please at this moment I don't want to be the eldest, I don't want to be the man of the house. I just want us and its getting so hard to ask for that." Louis finished with tears rolling down his cheeks. Harry quickly wrapped his arms around Louis and held him until his sobs became too much that Louis had started choking on them.

"Shit! Boo-bear we have get you standing." Harry whispered out, his voice still non-existent. Carefully Harry manoeuvred Louis out of the bunk and place his back to the divider door and crowded into his space making him drink Harry in. Harry also places his hand over Louis ears and made them lock eyes.

"That's right Lou. Just you and me nothing or else no one else. I have you and you have me." Louis slowly relaxed into Harry's hold and slumped into his chest.

"You really need to stop talking me love and I can feel how badly you want to cough. Let it out my darling." Harry chuckled and let out the chesty cough he had been holding in, unfortunately his lungs nearly buckled under the pressure, thankfully Louis heard it and untangled himself from Harry and reached for the younger lad's carry case that he takes on the planes and pulls out Harry's emergency inhaler.

"And that's why we don't hold them in love." Harry just rolled his eyes and snatched up his phone.

"Louis can we please discuss what just happened and what you just said."

"No." Louis said with an air of finality while Harry glared, "We'll discuss this when you're well enough to talk. I will not have this conversation beforehand and please baby do me a favour and don't push?" Harry threw his inhaler onto his bunk and really looked at Louis.

"Harry Edward Tomlinson, I know that look. I invented that look. Leave it be. I am begging you."

"You begging? That's a first." Harry typed out on his phone.

"Harry." Louis growled making Harry shiver in the best way possible. "Don't you ever forget who's in charge here."

"Oh Lou, Lou, Lou. One day I'm going to teach you how to relinquish control and when that day comes, you're going to thank me." Now it was Louis' turn to crowd Harry against the divider, he wrapped his fingers in the baby curls at the nape of Harry's neck and kissed him harshly.

"You're so lucky I love you." Louis says after they've both come up for air. Harry fixes Louis' fringe. Whispering out as silently as possible.

"Do you still?" Louis' breath hitches and looks incredulously at Harry before pulling him into his arms.

"Of course I do angel. Of course I do. We will talk in detail when you can hold a conversation without the use of me phone but please love never, ever doubt my love for you. I did put a ring on it for a reason." His hands still tangled up in Harry's hair he brings them close together again, but this kiss is soft, sweet and holds of thefeeling of home. "Come on baby we need to rest." Harry nodded but quickly hugged Louis with everything he had, and Louis sighed contently into Harry's neck. Soon enough Louis pulls back and intertwines their hands and gently leads Harry back to the bunks.