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It had been seventy-two hours since Jonathan had finally spoken to the police. Ted still had Jonathan's phone shut in his glove box, which was fine with him. Social media didn't seem like a good idea at the moment. He didn't want to see the disappointment in everyone for disappearing again.

At night, Ted would knock on the door and bring Jonathan whatever he made or ordered for dinner. Jonathan would usually be asleep, and stumble out of bed to open the door. A blush would be on his cheeks, embarrassed of being taken care of.

Tonight, Ted dragged Jonathan out of bed. He had invited Charlie out for a movie night, hoping to see a bit of the old Jonathan once again.

He didn't want to admit it, but it took some convincing for Charlie. The man refused to be around Jonathan after witnessing everything that happened with Ezra. The last thing the man wanted to do was see Jonathan on the last laps of withdrawals.

"Charlie, he's much better. He's eating better and he talks more, but he's still so reserved. I just need your help bringing normalcy back to him." Ted groaned after Charlie refused once more.

An outrage happened after Chuckle Sandwich posted that Jonathan would no longer be a part of the podcast for an undertermined amount of time. Charlie hated being in controversy, so he seemed a bit frustrated with Jonathan.

"Ted, he's not the same person anymore. I'm not sure I'd be able to look him in the eyes!" It hurt a bit to say, but Charlie sadly meant it.

Ezra had turned Jonathan into a mess of a person. The once care-free, open, and wild man was now reserved, shy, and self-conscious.

Being around him was uncomfortable. The tall man had dark bags under his eyes and was much more slender. He was constantly avoiding eye contact and stuttered and stumbled over his words.

And he was so quiet. That really bothered Ted.

"Charlie, I'm sorry, but you need to stop being so selfish. He was tormented and blackmailed. Please, help me." Ted felt himself break a bit.

The pressure of taking care of Jonathan had really weighed him down. At any moment he was scared to walk in and find the man had relapsed, or worse, committed suicide.

He did give Jonathan a weak edible, since the man was having trouble eating and was so tense and jumpy. After the gummy kicked in, Jonathan found himself munching on all the food his stomach had desperately wanted.

For the first time, Jonathan had giggled. It was small and barely noticeable, but Ted heard it and practically cried. So he continued to let Jonathan play stupid videos so he could keep laughing.

The door opened and closed, signaling Charlie had finally arrived. He had a few grocery bags in his hands, filled with junk food and drinks. "Where should I put these?"

Ted motioned to the kitchen, sinking down to Jonathan's eye level to whisper. He made sure Charlie had left before speaking. "Do not let Charlie find out you took an edible. Do you understand?"

Jonathan tried to look serious as he nodded. Ted smiled, trying not to laugh, which caused Jonathan to let out a laugh. He raised his eyebrows and gave him a curt nod before rushing to the kitchen to help Charlie set everything up for easy consuming.

Obviously, Ted had forced Jonathan to pick a movie, so they were watching Bad Trip, a movie by Eric Andre. Charlie handed Jonathan a bowl of popcorn with a small smile.

"Charlie!" Jonathan cheered, accepting the bowl and stuffing a handful into his mouth.

The man smiled, "It's nice to see you again, man. You picked a good movie!"

Jonathan nodded with a small smile. He was scared to say anything after Ted's warning, even though his mind was racing with things to say. He felt a little churn in his stomach, but brushed it off as nervousness.

Thirty minutes into the movie, and Jonathan had his snacks pushed far away. The smell of the grease and different candy flavors were filling his nose and making him feel queasy. He pulled out his phone and sent a text to Ted.

'schlatt: i think i ate too much shit and i feel sick what do i do'

Jonathan sent a glare towards Ted, who didn't notice it for a few minutes. The man picked up his phone, eyes widening after he read the message. Jonathan sighed deeply, trying to stabilize his breathing as the panic arose.

His throat felt tight, and he knew what that meant. Before Ted couldn't even think of a response, Jonathan jumped up and ran out of the room and towards the bathroom.

The retching sound was clear as day, despite the door being closed. Ted jumped up, demanding that Charlie not move from his spot.

"Are you okay buddy?" Ted whispered, opening the bathroom door and kneeling down to rub Jonathan's back.

Jonathan let out a groan, leaning his head on the toilet as it flushed. He didn't care about the smallest splash of toilet water that flicked him in the forehead, either. His ribs were aching from vomiting and his mouth tasted awful.

Ted helped him stand up, trying not to pay attention to the sweat or the puke-breath. He handed him a little plastic cup full of mouth wash, giving Jonathan a small smile of encouragement.

"I'm sorry I ruined everything." Jonathan said. He then sloshed the mouthwash in his mouth, feeling inner relief at the taste. After a moment he spit out the mouthwash and rinsed his mouth.

Ted poked his head out, making sure Charlie wasn't around to hear them speak. "You don't ruin everything, Schlatt. The junk food was probably too much for your stomach."

Depsite Ted's best effort to comfort Jonathan, he started to cry. He pushed the toilet lid down and plopped down on it in defeat. His large hands were pressed against his eyes, trying to hide the tears.

"I hate myself." Jonathan whimpered, sniffling a bit.

Everything was so great for so long, and here he was.  Broken, crying, and heart-broken about a man who tore him to pieces.

"Does it ever get easier? I know you and Madi didn't have all the crazy shit, but did it hurt a lot too?" Jonathan asked. His watery eyes made contact with Ted's.

"Honestly, it sucked more before it happened. She had a lot going on in her own life, and I was about to move very far away. It felt like we were trying to save something that had already been lost." Ted explained.

Hearing that was supposed to make Jonathan feel better, but it honestly made him feel worse. Their love clearly had been lost, but why did Jonathan still feel so torn apart? Why did he still long for Ezra?

"Do you think I'm pathetic for still loving him?" Jonathan whispered after a few moments of silence.

Ted let out a soft laugh, offering his hand to help Jonathan stand back up. He dusted off his shoulders like he was a proud dad.

"A little bit." Ted laughed, earning a small smile from Jonathan. "I think you long for what you used to have, and that it hurts that someone you loved so much did this to you."

And that was it. Jonathan felt a bit of relief wash over him, because yes! For the first time he felt like his emotions were understood!

"We should go back to the movie." Jonathan whispered, still smiling.

Agreeing, Ted nodded and pushed open the door. He felt accomplished, like finally cracked open the shell that Jonathan was imprisoned in.

---
so i guess ive been spelling schlatts name wrong and its actually johnathan?

oh well its too late literally all my fics are spelled this way lol

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