Diaries of the Grieving

Two - Nevaeh

Now don't take my word on this. I could be wrong, but I feel as if I'm being watched.

Hypothetically speaking.

It's like these people haven't seen another breathing human walk the planet before.

All I'm doing is sitting down in my seat, noting down the date and learning objectives that Mr O'Connell has laid out for us, when I can sense 30 odd or more eyes zoning in with direct eye contact towards the back of my head.

Objectively, I may just be paranoid, self obsessed and have a heartful of vanity, but from that conversation with Jax earlier, I'm gonna go with the bias that to these people, I might as well be walking down the hall with an arrow with the words "new kid" attached to my back.

With that thought to mind, I completely spaced that I'd see him here so quickly. To be honest I'd assume the school was way too big for being the only high school in the area, that our paths would unlikely ever cross.

Guess I was wrong.

Whether I'm happy or not about it is another thing. I must admit, it was nice to see a familiar face, even if we barely know each other. But I don't think the encounter is gonna happen often. From the first second entering class, I heard girls in the far back end of the room talking about Jax. He seems as if he's a household name here and fly's above and beyond the radar. If I were to be involved with him, it's just gonna ruin my plans of trying to wing the last year of high school with minimum input and social responsibilities of having to make many friends, especially those with a raging social circle.

"Psst."

I turn my head to the side and see a guy in a varsity jacket and hair almost white grinning at me.

"You're new right?" he say's.

I quickly dash my eyes towards the front to make sure the teacher isn't looking and nod my head in reply. I'm not trying to get in trouble, especially on my first day. Call it what you will but my anxiety can't take it and that would just be embarrassing.

"Yeah I don't know why I asked, everyone can tell." he whispers.

I raise a brow.

"Meaning?" I say.

Flustered, he retraces back, "I didn't mean it in a bad way, it's just we don't have many new kids."

"I kinda figured."

"Well you'll get used to the stares soon enough. Trust me, it'll die down eventually."

"I don't think I'll ever get used to it to be honest." I sigh.

"Well how about you hang with us during lunch. It'll make you more comfortable." he suggests.

"I don't know..." I say nervously.

"Come on, it'll be fun, you can meet my buddy's. We're more than welcoming."

From the way he's smiling he seems anything but. However, before I can decline his invitation again, a girl chimes in from behind him.

"Drop it Damien, she's not interested." she whispers.

He turns in his seat, "don't remember asking you Collins."

"Yet I'm still answering. Learn how to take a hint."

"If you all would stop whispering with whatever seems to be more interesting than my lesson, then by all means continue." I hear from the front.

Quickly turning my head round, I focus my gaze on my notebook and anxiously tap my pen on the paper, already feeling my face get hot.

After 20 minutes go by and the class ends, I'm desperate to get out of there, only when I realise I don't know where I'm going. I pull out my schedule, when the familiar black hair that saved me earlier comes into my viewpoint.