Shrek X Obama

Chapter One <3

"You need to talk to him," Biden whispered to Obama as they sat in the back of Science. The teacher, Ms. Frizzle, had just brought the students back from a field trip to the inside of the principal's stomach.

"C'mon man," Obama said, rolling his eyes. "Like he'd ever talk to me. He's a jock and I'm a nerd. It just doesn't work. Have you even seen movies?" Biden sighed and slid down in his seat. Staring at the clock, Obama watched as the seconds slowly ticked away, longing for the moment he could see Shrek. Their lockers were right next to each other, so Obama had enough time to chat with him. He smiled as the bell rang, and the room was immediately filled by the sounds of chattering students. As Obama stood up and started to walk out with his books under his arm, a leg stuck out and tripped him. The rough carpet scrapped his face as he fell, and a booming laugh rang out.
"What an idiot," the person said. Biden rushed over and picked Obama up. The two met face-to-face with Gru, the school bully. Seeing as the school had an obvious hierarchy, there was nothing the two could do other than to just look the other way. But not today. Not for Obama.
"Shut up already, Gru," he said under his breath.
"What was that?" He asked, standing up. His long nose almost touched Obama's forehead.
"I said, shut up you asshole." Gru shoved him over onto the ground, and laughed as he grabbed an object from his bookbag.
"What is that thing?" Biden asked.
"This is my prototype of an invention I'm working on. I call it - the gas blaster."
"Fart gun has a better ring," Obama chimed in. Gru lifted it up and pulled the trigger, releasing a fowl stench into the face of Obama. He coughed as Gru laughed and walked out of the room.
"Maybe I won't have good luck talking to Shrek," Obama said after he got back onto his feet.
"Don't say that. Gru always torments you." Biden put his hand onto his buddy's shoulder.
"Yeah. You're right. And I only have around..." He looked at his watch. "5 minutes to talk to him!" Obama quickly grabbed his books and sprinted out the door.
"GO GET 'EM TIGER!" Biden yelled to him as he went down the hallway.