Music Stories

When Can I See You Again?

Its night, again. I don't want to go home. I just need to live my life. I've been doing this since so long. I need some change. I desperately need it. I thought to myself, while walking back home. Going through the same road once again tonight. 

I need to end this. I started walking towards the railing of the bridge. This bridge was built in 1600s something and still stands perfectly. It connects the cities. And when I get late from office because my boss changed his mind and told us to do the work which wasn't important until yesterday became high priority today, which happens frequently, I walk back to my home. Its around a mile. Its like my office is at one end of the bridge and my home is on the other end. 

Home, its not even considered as one. Living alone was one of my freedom key but if living alone is like this, I want to get grounded again. At least I had my things to enjoy myself while staying in the room. 

I reached the railing and was standing there, looking down. It must be around half a mile to water. Even though I have money and transport I haven't even touched this water. I imagined  myself going there every Sunday night with that one person whom I want to share my life with and just spend the rest of the night looking at the stars. That would have been nice. 

I leave the thought of jumping for the 50th time this year. And its the starting third month of the year. The eight days on which I didn't think of jumping were Sundays. I really live for them to come by and relieve my stress. 

I looked at the water for the last time and started walking again, but stopped for a second. I closed my eyes and felt that I should just stay for few more moments and enjoy the sound of fast cars moving and sound of water flowing. Just be in the moment. 

I looked around. I saw a couple standing hand in hand. Its been so long since I have felt someone else's warmth. I am sure it feels nice. My eyes roamed around the other side of the road, some people walking. A little girl standing holding, most probably, her mother's hand. 

I looked straight ahead and saw a man looking down the bridge. I stared at him. He looked nice with his elegant and sophisticated clothes, he wore a hoodie of light grey color and an overcoat of  air force blue color with black jeans and white canvas. Okay they might not be elegant but they looked so good on him. But I am sure that any color would look good on him if he smiles like that. He smiled looking at the water and his dimples showed up. He looked mesmerizing. I was staring at him and I got lost. His messy hair, mostly due to the cold breeze but it didn't ruin his overalls. 

"Hey there!"

I didn't even realize but I was now standing next to him. And he just spoke and bought me out of  my world of admiring him. I was standing very close to him. The close you stand to someone you know, that close. I could not form any reply but said.

"H-hi..." He looked at me and smile, killing me by showing those dimples. I felt my checks burning and all of a sudden I didn't feel cold.

"Ahmm.... Are you feeling okay?" he said with his honey voice, I was not paying attention but he tapped my shoulder and repeated himself.  "Are you okay? You don't look fine, do you want me to take you to hospital or something?" he said with concern in his voice, or maybe not concern but I don't know if I am fine or not, I just don't know. 

"I-I thin-nk I a-am go-od." Oh my god why in the world am I stuttering. I have never stuttered before, or maybe its because of him. "I don't think you are. Come with me." with that, he started dragging me. I was too stunned to do anything I was just being dragged and allowed him to pull me whichever way he wanted me to go.