Tere Liye

Chapter 12

Dil yeh dhokha dhadi kar dega, Socha na tha,

Itni yeh gadbadi kar dega, Socha na tha,

Aisi mushkil khadi kar dega, Socha na tha,

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True to her words, Shehnaaz gave her best. After all, she was doing this for them...for herself....she couldn't give up, she had no option of giving up. Her heart pounded in her ears, her head feeling heavy as tears clouded her eyes. Her body ached, her leg muscles screaming from the sudden exertion they were undergoing...not being used to such torture ever before. 

Although each step that she took felt so heavy, weighing her down...the presence of Sidharth and his comforting words kept her going.

"You're doing amazing sweetheart!" He would praise her when he would notice her slowing down or losing motivation.

"Just like that baby! Slow and deep breaths....focus on your breathing.....take longer steps to minimise the amount of energy you use"

It was like his words held some inevitable power as they would suddenly give her this surge of power that she did not think she had. Whenever she would feel like she was about to collapse or was on the verge of giving up, Sidharth would praise her or whisper sweet nothings that made her regain her energy and motivated her to keep going...to make him proud and unknown to her he was beaming with happiness; seeing her give her best had his chest expanding with joy. 

His chota sher was not one of them that gave up when faced with hardships! She had conquered her hardship, gained strength and pushed herself to give her best and he was extremely happy. Something that today's world lacked because of such advancement was self-belief and strength...they were learning to give up instead of trying to learn and giving things a try. However, his girl was not one of them...she knew how to not give up! 

"Good girl! Keep your breathing steady just like this....bohat acha kari hai baby, bas thoda aur! Yes...longer leaps...breathe in and out...." Sidharth encouraged her as he continued to run beside her, the smallest smile resting on his lips as he watched her form. She was tired, sweaty and achy; he could see that but he was impressed to see her continue to run...she was not going to give up. This run could be extreme for anyone and Shehnaaz was even lower than a beginner's status. He could see how she wanted to stop, to just rest but she kept going...just like a sher she gave her everything.

Shehnaaz wanted to see him proud of her, to tell her that she had made him extremely happy. She desired to have his approval, to see him take pride in her...she wanted to be his best student.  Usse unki ankhein dekhni thi jismein sirf uska liya pyaar ho, uska liya proudness. It was hard to explain and even to comprehend. It wasn't possible to want something like that out of a stranger you had just met. But what if that stranger did not feel foreign? Sidharth toh anjaan hota huwa bhi apnai tha na? 

Woh perfect nahi thi, Sidharth ka qabil bhi nahi thi...he deserved someone much better than her but she was selfish. She wanted all of him to herself. His smile was only for her, his hugs were only hers, his kisses, his love, his attention, his care, his anger, his concern and worry. He was entirely hers. 

Kya karoon Rab ji? Jaanti hoon ka main unkai qabil nahi hoon...haq...haq nahi rakhna chaiya mujhe unpar! Main kissi ka bhi qabil nahi rahi aur yeh to phir Sidharth hai. Inhe sab perfect milna chaiya par pata nahi kyun main unse dhoor nahi reh sakti ya yai kahoon kai unse dhoor rehna nahi chaati...aisa maina khabhie feel nahi kiya. Ap ko pata hai na Rab ji...pehli baar maina aisa pyaar feel kiya hai...humesha jaah hatoon sai marr kahi hai, aaj pehli baar unse pyaar mil rah hai...Shehnaaz had only seen and felt hands hit her, release anger and torture but this was the first time that she had seen hands do the opposite...to love, carress her...