The Pope Of Comber

Chapter 14

Buck Mad

The ManorHouseGardens: Noon: the sixth week of location

Most people call me 'Alex' or 'Buck Alex' I don't quite understand what the 'Buck' means.

Someone said to me 'Buck Alex' had something to do with an old eejit that lived in Belfast some years ago, so they say.

I have been doing this job now must be going on twenty eight years. So I think part of me must like it.

The money's not bad and anyway most of the hard-work is done by those 'Eastern Europeans' these days.

Good hard workers those wee foreign people.

Sometimes, well most times they sit and listen to my sermons during lunchtime right here on the estate.

It's great to look out and see their wee happy smiley faces.

Well technically I don't write the sermons.

My wee mate Issy (Isaac) does a good job on that front.

Not sure if they 'The Eastern Europeans' understand what I'm saying.

But they say that God works in mysterious ways.

And well, if I can save a soul or two in this big world of ours. Then I've done a good job in my book anyway.

I'm in my fifties now, fifty five to be exact, and I feel every bit of it some days.

Yeah, it's a good life most of the time.

Don't have a lot of what you would call close-friends.

I got married to my childhood sweetheart, as they call it, her name was Jane. I was twenty-something when we tied the knot. Jane was a couple of years younger. We had a Son a few months later his name was Michael. I picked his name. She wanted to call him Simon.

Simple-Simon

Being there at the birth of my son changed me as a young man, that's when it happened!

I found the Lord, or maybe he found me.

The miracle of life the birth of my son I knew then there had to be a God out there.

So after that one great miracle in my life I changed my ways. I stopped drinking and smoking, just like that!

I haven't looked back since that day, although Jane is long gone. She took herself off to England with a bastard English-soldier along with my wee son. I haven't seen head or tail of the two of them since.

It must be well over twenty-five years ago by now.

Jane, my ex-wife said I was impossible to live with. As all I did was talk about the 'Lord' and all the good things he had done in this world of ours.

She was just like all the other women out there 'A Harlot' just like the bible tells us.

All women are Harlot's from the devils harem. Not counting of course: Mother's, Sister's and Daughter's.

There are many things in this world I don't like, 'Homosexuals', 'Drink', 'Roman Catholics' and them there 'Muslims'.

There's a couple of politicians in this wee country could do with a good kick-up the arse. But I think there's a queue for that one.

If there was anyone I would love to kick-up the arse it would be 'The Pope' I wouldn't care if I broke me foot, it would be worth it.