Book of wonders (Spencer Reid x fem reader)

Just once 💔

Summary: when the team went on a case, the unsub shot reader and things didn't end well...

Warnings: sad/being shot/death/mentions of rape and murder/crying/bad ending/talks about funeral
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Well shit

I was currently in a warehouse as I just shot our unsub a second after he shot me. Unfortunately, it got me right in the chest area.

I killed the unsub on accident but, it's fine. They were a rapist and a murderer.

I started to feel blood in my throat as the team arrived. Spencer was the first by my side.

"Y/n! Why? We we're right behind you!" He said. I smiled, all my memories started to flash at me one by one.

"It's...ok," I croaked out and started to cough on my blood. Spencer's eyes watered.

"Please don't say that, you gonna be fine." He told me as he cupped my cheeks. I exhaled.

Spencer and I had been dating for about three years now. It'd been the happiest years of my life though. I just felt bad that I couldn't have more time with the man I fell in love with.

"I love...you." I whispered to him and pulled my hands to his, squeezing them.

"No, no! Please don't die. I can't take that!" He cried at me.

I'm sorry. I thought as I smiled up at him.

I remember puckering my lips for a kiss as I relaxed. He smiled sadly as he bent down and kissed me one last time.

I felt my last breath leave my body as I died in my lovers arms. I wish I didn't go out that way though, but it's not the worst.

Spencer's pov

I felt her body relaxed as it stopped. I felt her hands stop squeezing mine and her lips go back to normal.

I opened my eyes to see hers were closed. The tears from my eyes finally pooled over.

"Y/n! Please! Come back!" I cried to her. But she didn't have a sassy response. I felt a hand on my shoulder as someone pulled me back.

I fot with them to go back to my love. They pulled me back as I watched people try to help her.

I just cried

I lost the love of my life, my girlfriend, my lover, my everything. I was being pulled up by someone and hugged tightly. I cried into there shoulder as I lost myself.

Time skip

It's been about three weeks sense the love of my life died.

It was her funeral today

Do you really want to go? I asked myself.

I'd been in a depressed state since I got home that night. JJ, Emily and Penelope had visit me the most, take care of and make sure I was gonna be alright.

But I wasn't the only one to loss Y/n. She was apart of the team.

So most of the team had taken a couple days. I haven't even been back to work. I just been in my bed, doing nothing.

I was getting dressed when I heard a clunk hit the floor. I looked down to see a bottle, my Dilaudid bottle.

I picked it up and held it for a minute, contemplating.

Should I take some?

It'll only be once.

It'll make me feel good.

All those thoughts clogged my head as I debated whether or not I should do it. I sighed and just thought 'only once' and grabbed the syringe in my closet.

I walked over and undid my belt, tying it on my upper forearm before grabbing the syringe. I stabbed it through the bottle and collected some of the liquid.

What would Y/n think?

That thought stopped me from doing anything. I don't know what she would think. But something kept bugging me.

I need this

I kept telling myself as I continue to take out the syringe and put it close to my arm.

What would she think?

I was getting annoyed.

Who cares what she thought! She's not here!

I told myself as I begin to use the syringe to it's use. It all hit me at once. My body relaxed as I hit the pillow on my bed.

I felt safe and home. I really needed this.

I closed my eyes and I was about to sleep when suddenly, I felt a hand on my arm. I Open my eyes to see the one person I thought was gone.

"Y/n?" I asked stunned. She smiled and nodded her head.

"Hey." She said and I got up, pulled her in for a loving hug. She chuckled and hugged me back.

"Baby..." she said after a few minutes. I knew what was gonna happen.

"No! Please don't leave again!" I told her. She sighed and moved her head to look at me.

"You can't take that stuff again, ever! Promise me you'll not take it." She asked me. I sighed.

"But-but I'll be able to see you! I can love you and I-" I rambled before she cut me off.

"Spence, I'm dead. Your just hallucinating stuff. I'm not real. You'll have to move on. I don't want you to mope around for the rest of your life!" She told me. I cried.

"I don't want to." I whispered to her. She gave me a sad smile before giving me a soft kiss.

"I want you to be happy, and the only way for you to do that is to move on." She said. I sadly nodded.

"Ok..." I replied and shoved my face in her shoulder.

"I love you." She told me after a long minute.

"I'll love you forever. And when I die I'll love you in the after life." I promised her. She chuckled and kissed my four head.

"Till then, my love." She said and got up, walked to the door. But before she could leave she turned around to look at me.

I smiled at her as she waved goodbye. I close my eyes and relaxed again, this time, i woke up with a gasped.

I looked around to see the exact same thing. I got up to find Y/n outside. She wasn't there. But I wasn't upset about it, I was just ok with it. Knowing I'll see her eventually.