The Witching Hour Killer

TWELVE - THOMAS

Sunday, 31st October, PM

Noah Roberts.
Born 31st October 2021 at 03:08am weighing exactly 6lb 4oz.

I gawped in absolute disbelief as I cradled my son in my arms. A mixture of terror and amazement filled me knowing that he was finally here in the world. A tiny fragile person with the most beautiful blue eyes I had ever seen and a head full of jet-black hair. He was mine and I was his. For the rest of my life. Tears brimmed in my eyes at the realisation and one dropped onto his crown.
He fussed a little with a grunt and a squirm as he tried to reposition himself in a more comfortable position against my chest. I could feel my heart racing, not wanting to disturb him in any way.

"Shh." I rocked my arms a little, trying to settle him. "Daddy's got you now." More tears spilled causing me to laugh, slightly embarrassed.

"They're little heartbreakers, aren't they?" The midwife smiled towards me and I returned with an agreeing nod.
I glanced over at Alana who was still sleeping deeply in the hospital bed, her chest rising and falling rhythmically, her condition stable. She had been through hell and back in the past twenty-four hours delivering Noah.
I closed my eyes as I thought of how much blood she had lost through the ordeal. Remembered the sound of the heart monitor beeping so erratically when she was wheeled into the operating theatre.
I remembered the feeling of my chest tightening at the thought of losing my wife. The panic I felt knowing that I might have walked out of this hospital alone with my newborn son and raised him without her by my side.

I ran through the doors of the hospital a day earlier as Gina raced up to me and stumbled on her words as she tried to explain what happened. I needed to see Alana. Needed to hold her hand and assure her that it would be ok. All the stress of work vanished in an instant as I now took on the greatest job of all; husband and father.

When I glanced down at Noah again, his eyes were open wide looking straight into my own. His miniature fingers were clamped around my thumb and it felt like they had squeezed my heart, too. I cherished his innocence and purity in that moment. He had no idea that only hours ago, his mother's life hung in the balance and my world had been turned upside down. The words she had uttered moments after delivery when she knew she was slipping away.
"Take our boy, Thomas. Take good care of him for me. Tell him that mummy loves him."
I was a mess. Holding this tiny infant in my arms, knowing that I would do anything in my power to reunite him with his mother the moment she came out of surgery. Feeling the palpable tension before hearing the best words I would ever hear.
"She's ok, Mr Roberts. The surgery went well and she's stable. She's coming back to you now."
How could something as small as him have such a hold on me?
I brought him up to my lips and kissed his head ever so gently and he cooed in response.

"You're a little fighter." I whispered against his cheek and he began to grizzle, his face scrunching and gearing up to scream the place down.
"Shh." I rocked again. "You're ok."
Glancing across the room, I quickly searched for the bottle I had attempted to feed him a couple of minutes ago, but being the stubborn thing that he is, he rejected it completely.

"Let me try." Alana's tiny voice spoke from the bed, alerting me.

"You're awake." I walked towards her with a squirming Noah in my arms. "How are you feeling?"
She cupped his little body and brought him towards her bare chest. Her eyes were still partially closed and she exhaled gratefully when she felt him start to latch and feed.
I had never seen such strength from a single person. Even in her darkest hours, she was still caring for our son and her only priority was him.  She was exhausted, mentally and physically. I wanted so badly to trade places with her and be the one to take the pain so she could get some rest.

"Here, let me." I took a pillow from the chair behind me and positioned it below Noah's head so Alana could sleep in the process.

"Thank you." She half-smiled at me, her eyes droopy. "You're amazing."

"You're the amazing one, Collins." I kissed her knuckles. "You amaze me every day."
My entire world was right in front of me in the shape of a beautiful woman and our baby boy. There was nothing in this world I wouldn't do for them.
Her eyes closed again and she was asleep instantly. The sound of small snores and suckling noises from Noah were like music to my ears.

"How is everything?" The midwife had poked her head around the door.

"Perfect." I answered, never taking my eyes from Alana and Noah. "Everything is perfect."

"Great. I'll leave you guys to it. Just give me a shout if you need anything and remember that you should get some sleep too." Her voice was soft and low.

"Of course. Thank you." I smiled to acknowledge her kindness. She had seen how tense the situation was before and was the first person to raise the alert of Alana's deteriorating condition and get her help. She saved her life and by extension saved my own. I would always be grateful for that.

"I'll just rest my eyes for a second." I murmured, sitting back in the armchair and letting my body relax into the soft cushioning. "Just for a second." My words were slurred as sleep gripped me and pulled me away.

                                    —————

Tuesday, 2nd November, AM

I wrestled with the car seat and clicked it in place on the back seat.

"You sure you know what you're doing?" Alana's cocky voice was back as she sat with Noah on her lap, watching me struggle.
I had battled through two nights of screaming, thirteen nappy changes and more vomit than I was comfortable with, yet this car seat was becoming my biggest challenge yet.

"Of course I know what I'm doing." I lied and gave the seat a wiggle. No movement, excellent.
"Look at that. A seat fit for a king." My smile grew triumphantly. "Come on then little man. Time for you to come home where you belong." I reached down and picked Noah up, cupping his head in one hand and placing him down in the brand new seat that was so much bigger than him. The straps clicked over him securely and I smiled at him, making a comical face. "Yay, all done!"

I closed the car door quietly and kept my eyes fixed on him through the window. He truly was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. And he was part of me. We made him.

"All sorted?" Alana pulled herself from the wheelchair slowly and winced a little in pain.

"All sorted, Darlin'." I offered her my hand for stability. "Now let's get you both home, shall we?"
She smiled gratefully and made her way towards the passenger seat.
"Please." She slowly positioned herself in the Audi. "I've been dying for a proper cup of tea ever since I got into that place. Literally."
My wife and her brilliant humour despite the dark times. I loved her more than I could ever articulate in that moment.

We were ready to start our lives together as a family, and as we left the hospital grounds, I felt relief wash over me.
We were ok. We were all leaving together.
"Do you want to go any slower?" My wife poked at me and I laughed out loud.
"I'm just being careful." I reached for her hand and brought it to my lips, kissing her knuckles and squeezing tight.

I had Alana and we had Noah. All I ever wanted in the world.
I had my happy ending with the girl of my dreams and she gave me the most precious gift of all - Noah.
I loved him more than I have loved anything on earth. Anything I had, I would give to him and all that I am is his forever. My blood. My son.

I would die before I let anything happen to him.