HE, HIM, AND US (Complete ✅)

Happier

Meanwhile on Earth 1

They are at a restaurant with some friends. Off Jumpol, Arm Weerayut, and Gun Atthaphan. Back at home, he hated them just as much as they hated him. They love him here. And he, them. With the group is a lady New has never seen. Not in this universe or his.

Her name is Sinu. She is new to the company.

Tay laughs hard at her jokes. He smiles too wide at her. The seat they are on seems to have shrunk. Tay is pressed to her side. New shifts until he feels Tay's warmth. This helps nothing. Tay still leans into her when he speaks. He hides behind her when he laughs. And answers too many of her questions. New bites the inside of his lips until he tastes blood.

He is reminded of Tawan back home. He didn't smile as much as this one but he would always pretend New was invisible in public. He would talk over New and leave his questions hanging. All of his attention, he gave to Gun. Or anyone. Anyone but him.

New's mood stales. His chest hurts and he just wants to go home and hide in his room. From these feelings. From himself. He's getting possessive again. Like before. Crazy selfish psychopath, as Tawan would call him.

"Is it just me or has New been different lately?" Gun is looking at him. His overly glossed lips close around a thick straw. Everyone's attention is drawn to him. "I can't quite put my finger on it but something is different."

His heart rate speeds up. His tongue feels thick in his mouth. They know. They know he's an imposter. They will kick him out. Alienate him as they did before. He is going to be alone again.

"What do you mean?" Tay's arm drapes around his shoulders. He tugs him closer to his side. "He's the same troublesome person." He smiles. The idiot's ears turn red when their eyes meet. Smiley Tawan is so in love with his New, it's impossible not to feel jealous.

He swallows and looks away. It appears he too is blushing from the attention. He has gotten too soft. He hates it. And loves it. Just 4 months in this place has changed him. It is nice to not be bitter about everything. Or to not get the urge to punch Tawan in the face when he sees him.

"It's not just New." Arm says. "Tay has been weird too. They seem closer."

"Shut up." Tawan pulls back his arm. He is pink on the neck and ears. This lovesick fool. "We are the same."

Off speaks with a mouthful of food. "It makes sense why Tay is happier these days." His eyes are mocking.

"True." Arm agrees, wiggling his brows.

"Shut up." Tay sinks down the seat. His eyes are begging his friends to stop. They seem to know about Tay's crush. He isn't doing much to conceal it. His double must be vacuous to not have noticed. "I'm not happy."

"So you're miserable?" Gun asks. He is laughing but the question brings back a memory.

You make me miserable, Thitipoom.

"I'm not miserable." Tay squeaks before New's trauma can further ruin his mood. "Leave us alone."

Tay's response makes him lighter. He releases the breath he is holding. "So what if he is happier?" He asks, grabs his drink, and takes a sip. "I am too."

They gape at him in silence. A bit too dramatic if you ask him.

"Gun is right." Arm announces, breathless. "You've changed. "The New I know would've changed the topic."

He coughs. He should do better at playing stupid. He shrugs. "Maybe I have changed."

Sinu looks lost. Left out. Good, New thinks. He wants her out. Forever.

*******************

"Say you fucking love me, Damnit."

"Did you wonder that you're just impossible to love, Thitipoom?"

New shoots up from his bed. His face is wet and the thumping of his heart shakes his rib cage. Perhaps it is crying too. He throws his covers off and walks across the cold floors to the kitchen.

He grabs an orange juice and chugs it straight from the container. His throat still feels parched. Water, yes water. He drinks half a bottle. He is still dehydrated.

"Stupid Vihokratana. You haunt me even in another fucking universe." He goes to the sink and washes the tears off his face. He is livid. "What an asshole! I am happy here, Tawan!" He says to the empty kitchen. "I am so happy! They love me. I don't make him miserable! He—he loves me."

He does not love you. Not you, Tay's voice is in his head.

"Shut up!" He bites his fist and screams as loud as he can. His throat is dryer when he is done. He drinks the other half of the bottle. "He loves me. It is possible to love me!" He tosses the bottle to the floor. It rattles until it hits the edge of the fridge and halts.

He considers calling Tawan for affirmation. It is 3 in the morning. He would be asleep. He does not want to bother the man. And also because, deep down, he knows this is not the Tawan he wants right now.

What kind of idiot is he? It seems he is more of a dolt than his doppelgänger. Anger makes breathing difficult. It is directed more to himself than anyone else.

He turns on the television in the living room. The quiet atmosphere is giving the voice in his head too much freedom to play. To taunt him. He settles to stay awake for the rest of the night. He does not want to dream about beautiful fierce eyes.

He likes it here. He is loved here. He has no business wanting someone who doesn't want him.