your song ➳ one shots

t e n ✿ check yes juliet - we the kings

I crumpled the paper I had just written on, throwing it into the bin like some sort of basketball. It has been in this pattern for sometime, I try to write something, yet it turns out real shitty so I just throw it. And here I am again, trying to do that article for the school paper which was due tomorrow. When I still didn't get the words that would render it right and make it sound precise, I groaned in frustration, throwing everything on my desk onto the floor, and went outside. Maybe, I just need a breather. Just a little one.

I slammed the door on my way outside, still pissed at myself for being such a person with shitty talent, and crappy self. I hated it. I despised the fact that my parents look up to me to set myself as an example to my sister yet here I am being such a constant failure. 

I do not know, but the only thing I had on my mind that day was to let go of all the steam inside me, so I went to my usual spot near the stream, and laid down on the grass a couple of meters away from the body of water, playing with some of the small rocks that came near my hands.

It was comforting, seemingly providing the solace I needed, the quietness I wanted. It gave me the peace of mind. However, I still find myself agitated on everything. How my parents think I should be doing this instead of that, and how I am being compared to my sister. It sucks. It sucks that you feel so abhorred, so anathematized, so unwanted. More than half of the school population think I am someone who's trying to be Little Miss All Good, someone so uptight, someone who sticks by every rule. They don't know how I'm just trying to build this facade of nobody trying to break into my walls. And now, I'm the one breaking down. And just right now, I felt the tears streaming down my face.

I closed my eyes as I felt the drops slowly becoming streams. I didn't want to see the sky when I cry, I didn't want to see the perfect view when it slowly sinks in how imperfect I am. I let all of my burdens build up and all I do is cry myself like this, releasing the emotional pain, the mental exhaustion.

I had no idea how many minutes has it been since I let myself succumb to my own tears until I felt someone take a spot next to me.

"You built walls that cause yourself to crumble."

"I...", I mumbled, sitting up.

"You put up a facade where everyone thinks you're strong, you can do it on your own, yet deep inside, you're screaming for help, you want to have someone rescue you from drowning in your own emotions", he continued.

When he said that, I let myself cry my heart out in front of him, the school's most popular guy. I didn't care at the moment if someone would see us and be grossed at how the school's nobody suddenly talked to someone who was in line with the Populars. Maybe, this is what I really need in my life, let someone in that would listen to you lay all your burdens down.

I felt a little bit relieved with him just listening to me, knowing at least someone was there for a nobody like me. That at least, even with the social inequality, he decided to come up and crack my walls a bit.

I started standing up, brushing the dry leaves off of my shorts when he suddenly pulled me in and caged me in a tight embrace.

"You need this", he said, feeling him smile on my shoulder. 

"T-thanks Ash", I stuttered, awkwardly putting my arms in a way to hug him back.

When he pulled away, he brushed his thumb on my face, sort of clearing the wetness cause by my tears.

"You're a wonderful person who isn't supposed to cry", he said. I smiled back in return, silently mumbling thank yous for everything he has done today, even for just a short while. For a few minutes, I felt like Ashton was just one of us, the Nobodys, the Ignored.