There's nothing here, in this empty cavity of flesh between breast and spine. You'll find no heart, no lungs, no skin. Nothing human left to observe or empathize with. You look in the empty grey eyes of a husk, floating along without purpose or path. Even though you expected more, even though you wanted a reason... I have no answers for you.
There is no real reason, no real intention, it was only to chase that numbness. In my journey to feel nothing, I never thought about what it would cost until It was too late. I don't remember surrendering my soul, but it does not dwell here. No heart to feel your pain, not a thought of worry. I exist in a void I've hand crafted, where nobody questions my wellness or my desire to remain in this draining place. Everyone here already knows what I'd say, if they asked me if I was doing okay, I'd say yes. A lie, only because I can't describe to you or anyone else what it feels like to drift through this world without the desire to wake up each day.
So stop searching, for the human being between these bones and echos of the past. She isn't here, she hasn't been in longer than you'd even imagine. This brain is nothing more than a fleshy prison which contains a darkness I'm too cowardly to kill. The person people expect, when they gaze in calculated grey eyes, does not look back. Only the husk, and the monsters that occupy them.
There's nobody left to hear you, when you voice your pain and your disappointment. Nobody left to feel the shame of regret and disappointment. This shell contains only memories now, past flashes of contentment and joy. So stop calling, don't message, don't bother. The person you're seeking is gone, you will not find them here.
Only the dead stare and the empty words of someone else.
