IDV oneshots

Edlucamike - IKEA

Edlucamike but they got lost in ikea, edgar is like a disney dad, luca wants to shit in a display toilet, and mike sighted the giant dino plushies //

           The happiest part of dating people was moving in together. That was what Edgar used to think, actually. Until Mike spilled a soda on his parent's passed down sofa, Luca accidently broke a lamp by trying to catch a football the two others were tossing back and forth, and all of Luca's past furniture looked like it came from the flea market. Through each accident, Edgar would get frustrated, of course, but he couldn't stay mad at the two blubbering idiots, no matter how much they absolutely pissed him off. The two actually helped humble him a bit, if someone looked at him. Ignoring that, he'd have to take the two on a road trip, to the closest furniture store, of course. Dreaded Ikea, for one, Edgar was sick of hearing the jokes about that place Mike and Luca cracked together and laughed at like it was the funniest thing ever. Edgar had turned on classical music to try to get at least ONE of the duo to stop, but then Luca just sang, providing vocals while Mike cheered him about. They didn't hush up until Edgar threatened to turn the car right back around, to which both responded by sitting up straighter, and expressing their love to the worldly known painter. "Your brown hair, so pretty! Like the mane of a lion, and the spirit of a king!" Mike shouted out, attempting to outdo the inventor next to him in the back seat. "Your skin! Clear and glowing! so... handsome! Best male wife material out there!" "Shut up! We're playing the silent game now!"

           For the remainder of the ride, Mike kept shooting faces at Luca, attempting to make the other laugh, which almost worked, until Edgar announced they'd arrived, Mike cheered out, and then Luca loudly announced he'd won. The performer whined, though allowed Luca to put on the man's backpack.. which had a leash on the back. Mike had requested it looked like an elephant, and Luca was allowed to walk while holding Edgar's hand, seeing as he'd forgotten his transformers one. As the trio walked through the doors, Edgar gritted his teeth at the loud chattering, though continued walking as Luca dug his head against the man's shoulders and Mike strained against his leash, blubbering about the show on the Tv near the store's daycare. "Can we get pizza while we're here? Luca forgot to bring snacks! I'm starving, Edgar! Lets share a romantic thing of meatballs!" The inventor snorted, glared over Edgar's shoulder and announced he'd won the quiet game, so within that case, he got to share meatballs with Edgar. The peach painter continued on to the furniture displays, both hands full with his two boyfriends. 

           The trio started in the living room sets, Edgar closely examining a couch as Mike sat upon it while making kissing noises to the two brunettes. Luca actually started kissing the blonde, until Edgar dragged Mike away on his leash to look at other stuff, leaving the third to scramble after both. Edgar had actually found a nice vanity for the bedroom, its window in an oval shape and white wood carved into specific patterns of swirls and flowers. The two boxes attached to its upper shelf were also quite cute, and practical. Mike found a lamp of multiple colors he demanded for his own workspace, which Edgar had placed in the basement after he accidently burned a hole into the second stair's flooring. Which then ruined their car, and Luca had spent a whole week fixing it. He now had his own area, which he claimed to want to complete with that lamp, and a rug he found in a child's bedroom display. "Look! It would give more color to the space, just like you always complain about Edgar!" He'd grumbled, but obliged to the request. That was, until Mike headed deeper into the children's section and found multiple stuffed dinosaurs, all of which were about almost as tall as him, and had prices that Luca wasn't too fond of. But to make Mike happy, he begged Edgar along with the acrobat. "Fine! Fine, but I want TWO minutes of no talking." He snapped out, glancing behind his shoulder to the two, Mike clutched Luca's hands and enthusiastically nodded his head. Then he'd moved on and continued to browse with Edgar, delighted his wishes were met.

           After that situation, the blissful two minutes of peace and spectacular artistry commenced, Edgar inspected every inch of the crafts, the fine polish and placement of each silver nail embedded into the furniture. Sometimes he'd feel Mike wrap his arms around his back, providing a fresh breath of comforting warmth.  Luca joined in as well, causing the embrace to become an annoyance as the painter had to drag both of them around. It was only until the weight suddenly dropped, he realized he didn't mind it that much, and only then did he realize he suddenly couldn't find Luca, of course, Mike was still there, snuggling against Edgar and pressing a kiss into the painter's neck, him being one that wasn't shy of showing public affection. He paused, grabbed Mike's hand, kissed it as his own good luck charm, and dragged him around to go find their third pea. Mike cried out his name, and Edgar muttered how this was exactly why he usually did the shopping. There was no worse thing than worrying where the inventor went, for the remaining found two. Through each step, he simply got more anxious, Luca's phone was in Mike's bag, and each trail of sweat slipping of his neck reminded Edgar of the danger Luca could drag himself into. "Lucaa! You're going to make us stay here all night! What about being hungry, babe?!" Mike called again, snapping Edgar out of his worrisome thoughts. That, in turn, allowed him to focus a bit. There weren't too many people deep into the store, of course, Luca didn't mind being in popular areas, but at least had the sense to stay out of crowds alone. The two had met when only Luca and Mike were dating, at a coffee shop where the two chattered about, constantly getting distracted, and distracting Edgar to his very, extremely, totally not untimed work. He'd gone over to lecture them, but ended up just standing there with his arms crossed and mouth halfway open. Luca introduced himself first. 

           Speaking of Luca, Mike had shaken Edgar's  arm and pulled him to a bathroom set, a tidy blue one with polished white cabinets and marble countertops. It also had a man staring at the wall decor, running an arm across a painting of a dolphin Edgar recognized. It was his own work, of course it was! He sold prints to countless stores, but didn't expect it to show up in a washroom buried along the walls of a furniture store. Upon Mike running forward to cry about the other brunette suddenly leaving, Luca snapped out of his trance and apologized. His voice was sheepish, embarrassment sown into each sentence. "I just got distracted, you know! Had to take a piss,  this was the only toilet I've seen in awhile..  I'm sure no one would notice, right Edgar?" The painter might've laughed if his work wasn't the picture being displayed, that just felt insulting. He might've also been madder if he didn't remember Luca was joking, the man used to work retail, he'd never do such a thing. Mike however, recoiled and gasped aloud. "Why, what do you mean?! My mouth isn't suit- Hmm hgm!" Edgar decided it was probably time to keep Mike's "suitable" mouth quite, and warn off any laughs from Luca with a glare. This was turning out to be a trainwreck! This behavior, in public nonetheless?! The two ought' to be lucky the heir adored them so! Why, if he didn't, he would've let the two get lost in here!" Having Luca grab onto Mike's hand- (the one that shook with less excitement than the other, the gymnast was happy to be going home and getting the things he ordered, which would arrive shortly after their shipment. Edgar had someone look for a plushie with not a single seam loose, beads glossy, and simply a perfect amount of stuffing. "We can stop by some fast food place on the way home, alright dears?" "Of course do-" "We should get Starbucks cake pops too! Oh, pretty pleaseee..?" The other men smiled, and walked forward again, returning to their cart with a small amount of miniature items. Except, they really couldn't find it. "Edgar, where did you park it?" "Get out your phone, and open a map. Use Luca's, yes, I know your phone is almost dead, but Mike's has been dead. No, we are not using mine, because the one I brought is strictly for business. No, I do not have a phone strictly for games. No, even if I did, you could not have it.