Death is Only the Beginning: A Guide to Vampirism

Nine: Who Needs Friends

Who needs friends?

No way, not me.

I need no one,

That's a certainty.

No one to depend on

No one to depend on me

No port to sail to

When I'm lost at sea.

I am strong and determined

That's all I need to be

I don't need a friend

And no friend needs me.

If today I feel lonely

Or feel sorry for me

I'll be strong tomorrow

That's a certainty.

Bah. Who needs friends?

It isn't out of spite that I choose a new place to sit in class. That would be childish, wouldn't it? After all, I've been hanging out with Lobo a lot lately, so it makes perfect sense to find a bench closer to where he sits. And I don't feel the slightest bit guilty, even though Emily Ann throws me those pitiful looks with those pleading blue puppy-dog eyes of hers. I'm here to get my diploma or some education or something like that, not make friends. I won't be suckered into forgiveness by her stupid eyes. I'm made of stronger stuff than that. I have my pride.

I just have to remember not to look in her direction.

The one good thing about my special night classes is that I'm allowed to work at whatever pace I want in whatever subject I want, just so long as it all gets done by the end of the year. Yesterday, I was on a roll and finished all the math assignments for the rest of the year. So I am pretty much done with that. Actually, I'm a little sad that math is over. To me, math is fun. It is like playing the logic puzzles that Dad got me addicted to. You just plug in the right numbers into the right formula and put it all together piece by piece. That's what I've always loved about math. There is a definite answer.

I enjoy Science, so that goes pretty quick. I only have a few more assignments for that. Everything but two research papers and one creative writing paper are finished for English. I tested out of the Health class. I wish I could test out of all of them. I just don't think I'm quite smart enough to pass them all.

Now history... that is one subject that just bores the socks right off me. I can never remember the dates. I have even tried making it a matching game in my head to connect dates with people and places, but it never really works for me. Usually, my brain goes off for a little vacation instead of paying attention and I end up doodling stories in my notebook. Sometimes I get so bored that I actually write down the number of minutes that are left until school is over, starting from one minute to one hundred or however many minutes are left. Then I start marking them off. Yes, I do realize that sounds weird, but I can live with that.. Anyhow, I'm saving history until very last.

The only things we students HAVE to do together is the occasional gym thing (usually we just have to run until we collapse, but occasionally, the teacher feels the need to make us do things as a group and we try to kill each other with 'tag' (football) and science labs. Other than that, we're pretty much on our own. My plans for the day/night is to ignore everyone else (especially the ex-friend) and see how much of my biology work I can get through. Maybe I can finish out this whole year by the end of the month.

"Are you going to ignore her forever?"

"That's the plan." I also try to ignore just how very close Lobo is sitting to me. But it's kind of difficult because he's so warm. Are all werewolves like good-smelling furnaces? I wonder how many of us supernaturals are out there. Two in one class seems like astronomical odds to me.