Swoon || McDoon x Reader || Trail To Oregon! || StarKid

chapter two | independence

Your family all got out of the wagon, your mother doing a quick headcount. A slim male in a tophat and a poncho came out behind your mother, nearly scaring the living daylights out of her.

"You're in Independence! Welcome to the city so pleasing that everyone's leaving! Fuck it, go west. Watch your backs, this city is hustling, with all kinds of bustling, and grit, go west. For Independece! Here are just a few things you should know:" This man said rather enthusiastically. It was safe to say that you weren't very fond of him. Yet he continued anyways, your father beaming a happy grin.

"Stay on the trail or you might get lost, don't pay the toll not worth the cost, marry rich so you don't die poor, a banker's best but you might die bored! And independent!" You felt as if that part was targeted towards you, however it sounded like a classic welcome speech. At least, for this odd city. 

He stepped in front of your family, to let everyone get a good look at him. He seemed rather sweaty, with thin fingers and a slim build. His hair was incredibly slicked back, but you couldn't tell if it was with gel, sweat, or grease.

"Take a gander kids! Independence, Missouri. You know, hundreds of families pass through this town, all of them headed down the trail just like us?" Your father announced, his arm around your mother's shoulder proudly. Your younger brother, Craphole, looked around in wonder while you and Mouthface seemed rather unimpressed.

"Hi! I've got Dysentery! You will too unless you stop to rest frequently. My wife and kids all died, but if I pull through, I'll travel at a st-st-steady pace from now on!" The male introduced, not bothering to give a name. He held his tophat to his chest, his eyes widened like a traumatized child.

"What's dysentery, dad?" Craphole asked, looking at his father.

"Nothing we'll ever have to worry about, son." Your father reassured with the same smile plastered on his face. The male left to continue on his business, and another rushed by, bumping into you.

"Woah, watch yourself, partner! Hey, don't push your ox too hard. Drive too fast and you'll end up with lame-footed animals. Then you'll have to kill 'em!" The man looked at your dead ox, just lying on the ground as a very ants pecked at it's corpse. Too soon, man. you thought. 

Craphole looked down at the ox's corpse and said: "I don't ever want to have to kill an animal, dad.."

"You won't have to, son!" Jack Bauer patted his son on the back.

The man left, and yet another one passed by your family, this time wearing a ridiculously small hat. "Did you know that the first stop on the trail, Fort Kerney was built by the U.S army to protect those bound for Oregon?" He chimed.

"I did know that!" Your grandfather excitedly raised his hand, a grin on his face.

"Ah! See, thank you for the advice and facts! See kids, not only is the trail to Oregon fun, it's also fun. And edumacational." Your father put his arms around you and Craphole, your mother putting her arm around her husband.

Then the man in the top hat came back.

"There's lots to learn, which kid is your favorite! Not all of them make it, of course sinkholes. A nine-month dirge, every marriage is tested! Thank God they invented divorce trending. In Independence, here's a piece of free advice for you." Oh no, here he goes again.

"Before you go, the General Store had all you need and plenty more! For your I-N-D-E-pendence!" So he was advertising for the general store? Well, no doubt that your father would suggest checking it out. 

"I guess we should go to the general store, huh?" Your father exclaimed, leading you all inside a building with GENERAL STORE on a large sign.

Ring ring! 

The bell on the door rang as the six of you walked in.

A man with a cowboy hat sped out of what you assumed was a break room. "Hey, how's it goin', welcome to the General Store so, you're headed down the trail to Oregon right? I can fix you up with what you need: Food, clothes, we even got a sale on wagon tongues, whatever the hell those are." He spoke rather quickly, which was probably a trick to get customers to spend more than they should at his store.

"Actually sir, we're doing this trip on a budget." Your father said, stepping towards the man.

"We're poor, out farm burned down. God did it to us, damn him to hell!" Craphole chimed in, raising his seven-year-old fist to the sky, grinning.

"We're farmers you see, which means we don't need things like food. Only the bare essentials. A wagon, and boxes and boxes of bullets." Your father emphasized the word farmer, as if to try to prove a point to the store owner.

"Mhm. You know, there are other general store owners who might try to sheist a newbie like you with some fast talking to turn a quick buck, but I like you, so let me tell you what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna give you one wagon for the price of two, not a penny less! And for an extra fifty bucks, I'm gonna throw in an ox for free!" He said rather quickly. You and your mother exchanged wary glances as you caught what the man said rushedly. Your father though, probably didn't catch the scam in his tone.

"You hear that gang? A free ox!" He beamed. 

"Yep! We're all friends! There's no war a-brewing, and no-ones abusing their right to own an ox like me!" The store owner said whilst pointing to the ox. "I pride myself on being a very good ox owner. Our love, well, it's perfectly normal." It sure didn't sound normal. Loving an ox..? You hoped he didn't mean anything weird by that, but with this store owner and the state of the ox, it was hard to tell.

"Here are just a few rules to live by: Your kids won't help when you're bit by a bear, or a snake, mother nature's really great! When you're out there on the Oregon Trail, feels like you are going to fail. But don't give up too soon, the world is your saloon! " The man warned. At least, it sounded more like a warning.

"Come on kids, your family's united!" Your mother said cheerfully

"I guess I'm excited-" Your sister grumbled.

"Oh I'm so excited, I pooped myself!" Your grandpa said, leaning over into a pile of hay to release his shit.

"Let's go where the gold rush is soaring, let's go exploring our Independence!" Your mother chimed happily.

Your father came back with the store owner, both of them saying words in unison cheerfully. "Be prepared to take your life with an arrow or a hunting knife. Stop and see Fort Laramie, there's nothing there but you'll have to pee. Do you understand, cause you look confused, take a look and see the mountain views. Stay away from Old-Man-Pridger, when he's drunk he'll take your liver. Life is not a petting zoo or you'll get ripped in two. By a bear! Or a snake! Mother nature's really great! Stayin' alive can be lots of fun! As long as you have a loaded gun! Something will go wrong, the list is far too long! Declare your independence!" 

The poetic exchange of wisdom and advice between your family was over. By that time, you had already run off to explore the town with your mother's permission.

Not knowing that you'd meet a certain bandit along the way.