Piece By Piece

Part 25

My blood roared in my ears. I was furious. I had finally found some peace, and some happiness, and they ruined it by hunting me down. They were just another version of Hydra in my mind, but instead of physical torture, it was emotional and mental beatings, day after day.

Tears streaked down my cheeks as I was faced with my decision. I could either get on the plane by myself, and have them find me in a matter of days, or I could go with Barnes and Rogers back to the Avengers and hope things are different. I also could let Barnes come with me, but he caused me so much pain I doubt I would feel better.

"Why, why is it so important that I come back now? It's not like you need me," I say, with a shaking voice.

"We do, Y/n! The compound is so dark, and empty," he replied, pleading with his eyes for me to understand.

"Fuck off. I barely existed when I was there, don't tell me it's not the same with me gone, the only difference is the spare room." It hurt to say it out loud but it was the truth. I never made a difference. I was just taking room. "I can't forgive you," I whispered.

"I know doll. I know." I lifted my teary eyes to his.

"Then why are you asking me this?" His eyes drilled into mine, with his blues swimming in guilt.

"I'm selfish and I need you."

"That's not a good enough reason." I said. I needed more than that. I already knew he was selfish.

"Please, Y/n," he paused. "We're falling apart." I wanted to badly to believe him than I was caving. It wasn't that I actually thought they needed me, but the thought that they could need me was enough to lure me back. I had caved and he saw it on my face. He took a few small steps toward me and gently placed his hands on my biceps. He drew me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me. I held my body rigid and stiff. I was unprepared for this gesture of comfort.

"Please let go," I whispered, and his arms immediately fell away. Part of me felt deflated that he let go so quickly, and part of me was relieved. I stepped away from the boarding line up and sat down on a bench and watched Steve walk over.

"What've you been up to, Y/n?" He asked. I knew he was trying to just ease into a conversation, but it already felt like an interrogation. I shrugged and pulled my phone out of my pocket. It was nearly midnight. I just wanted to sleep.

"Can we just go if we're going to go?" I asked, sighing. Barnes nodded and grabbed my bag for me. "I can carry it myself," I said flatly, opening my palm for him to hand it to me.

"I know you can, but you're tired and I'll just carry it for you," I stared at him for a moment, considering if I should pick a fight or just let it go. I decided to let it go for now. I was too tired for this. I looked away and began making my way out of the airport. I felt nauseous.

I slept for the entire ride back to the compound, and when we arrived it was morning. The sky was just beginning to brighten up. I was wrapped in a blanket when I opened my eyes and was being watched over by a nervous looking James Barnes. His fists were clenched tight and he tapped his foot rapidly.

I slowly stood up and stretched out my limbs before wrapping the blanket back around my shoulders. I looked around the Quinjet and prepared for the cold air to hit me when the hatch opened.

"Everyone missed you," Barnes said, and I just rolled my eyes.

"I think I'm just going to my room. Not really interested in the whole welcome party thing," I said quietly. These people abused and neglected me for years, they're lucky I even came back. There was no way I was going to walk in and give everyone a hug and say how glad I am to be back. I'm not glad to be back at all. Bucky muttered a small 'okay' and the hatch opened, letting a gush if cool wind inside, immediately setting goosebumps on my arms.

I felt Bucky's and Steve's eyes on me, expecting a panicky fit and for mr to run. I stick my chin up and walked across the deck and inside.

The kitchen occupied Natasha, Tony and Sam, who's faces froze when the turned around and saw me. Bucky came up behind me and Steve walked over to the kitchen.

"We convinced her to come home," he said.

"For a little while," I added. I wasn't here permanently. Not if after a week things go back to the way they were. Natasha spoke first, with a half smile.

"How're you doing?" She asked calmly, I admired her ability to pretend that the last time I saw her, it was a three on one fight in the middle of the night months ago.

"I've been better," I say quietly, holding my voice steady. It was true. I was happier and safer in Europe. Natasha just smiled.

"I don't blame you," she laughed a little. I gave her a half smile then said I was going to my room, and left down the hall. My room hadn't been touched, it looked like. My bed was the same, my nightstand drawers still had the items I left in them, my closet was untouched. They hadn't even gone in here. It was 6:30 am, and I knew I wouldn't sleep, I slept the whole way here, so instead I got in bed and turned on the tv. I threw on a hoodie and shorts and climbed under the covers, with pillows propped up behind me to sit me up. I scrolled through Netflix until I settled on a movie and snuggled even deeper into the bed.

I was finally feeling a bit settled when a knock came at the door. I sighed with frustration but paused my movie.

"Yes?" I sort of snapped at the door. It opened to reveal Tony, holding a smoothie in one hand a plate with a butter croissant in the other. I actually smiled. "Oh, thank you Tony."

"I knew you were in France and thought you'd want a croissant maybe for comfort. Just don't get crumbs on those sheets ya?" I smiled a bit more.

"You got it," he smiled at me and then walked out of the room and closed the door. I began happily eating my breakfast while continuing the movie. It was delicious and flakey and buttery. I was happily annoying my croissant, smoothie and my movie when there was another knock at the door. This one was quieter and less confident than Tony's. I knew exactly who it was when I heard it.