NICOLÀS

chapter 1

NIFEMI'S POV

I was exhausted.
Scratch that, I was on the verge of giving up. I looked down at my one year old daughter in my hands. She was fast asleep in the comfort of my presence and I reminded myself again the reason I needed to keep on living.

For the sake of my daughter.

I sighed and gently placed her on the thin mattress and secured the small pillow beside her so she would not roll off the bed.

I stood up and went to the small coffee table be the corner of the room. I found this small cubicle abandoned close to the forest away from the city. It was old and dusty, it looked like a shed.

With no where to go and a baby in my arms, I decided to clean it up and turn it into my small home. It was worth it, honestly. Even though it was small, it was still neat since we didn't really have much. We only had a two small bags full of some of my clothes, baby clothes, diapers and hygienic things.

I grabbed the small wallet from the coffee table and took out a few cash. I needed to go into the city and buy food for us to eat.

I turned back to my sleeping daughter. "Bye, sweetie", I whispered and walked out of the cubicle. The cold breeze hit my skin as I made my way down the snow filled road. It was early January but the sun wasn't still enough to melt all the snow.

Even though I couldn't really afford much, I still managed to dress decently. My thick l, curly hair was pulled in a bun on my head as I forgot to braid it today. Hope, my daughter was sick and I didn't really give myself the time of the day.

When babies are sick, they tend to cry a lot. My head still ached from all her crying throughout the night. I made a mental note to buy her drugs when I get paid tonight.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I made it into the city. The sound of car engines and horns made me groan at the noise. I can't wait to go back home. I ignored the curious stares that people gave me.

One time, a man asked me why I wasn't in school. Why won't you ask an eighteen years old girl what she was doing on the street instead of going to school.

I made my way to the familiar diner that I usually went to. The smell of fresh coffee filled my nose as I walked in. My eyes landed on the sugary doughnuts on the showcases and I wished I could buy them.

When was the last time I are something sugary and sweet. Ignoring my childish wants, I made my way to the counter ad ordered the usual. Two toasts with a bottled water and a bottle of warm milk.

"Thank you", I said as I paid the cashier and walked out. Later, I'd come back here for my work shift. Right now, I just need to get home.

I finally got home and walked in. Hope was still asleep, thankfully. She really needed that sleep, she cried so hard yesterday. We both need sleep.

I dropped the food on the coffee table and went to sit beside my daughter. She looked so peaceful in her sleep. Her long lush black lashes fanned her cheeks while her small pink lips formed a pout.

Everytime I looked at her, I never regret not aborting my pregnancy. Many girls my age would have aborted their pregnancy especially if they were raped. Which seventeen year old girl would want to walk around with shame.

On my birthday, my angel came into this world. I thought I was going to die. I didn't even have a place to stay. I still don't know who payed my hospital bills and left me money to take care of my baby.

I didn't have parents, they died the same day I got raped. What a coincidence, right? The fortunate part of it is that my daughter looks exactly like me. Dark skin, brown eyes and black curly hair; a the needed African American trait.

My mom was from Nigeria while my dad was from New Orleans. I inherited my mother's features but I took my dad's attitude. We were both sassy and a handful.

I didn't know I fell asleep until I heard a small whimper. I sat up straight and rubbed my eyes. Hope was looking everywhere with tears in her eyes. My heart broke as I gently carried her into my arms. "Mommy's here", I cooed as I tried to calm her down. I kissed her forehead and she relaxed a little.

I began to breastfeed her in order for her to calm down completely. If she didn't, she won't be able to eat anything. After she calmed down, I fed her half of the toast and gave her milk. I watched as my eight month old baby drank only half of the bottle.

I sighed and burped her before changing her diapers. It was already getting dark outside which meant I needed to leave for work soon. I softly sang her a lullaby till she slept off and I was relieved.

I stood up from the mattress and grabbed my winter coat before walking out of the house.

The sky was painted different shades of orange, pink and purple. It was beautiful.

I entered the city and maneuvered my way through the sea of people to the small restaurant where I worked. The warm air greeted me abd I immediately pulled of my coat as I walked to the counter.

Josie, the young woman by the cashier greeted me. "Hey, Mimi. How are you?", she asked with a warm smile. "I'm good, thank you", I replied as I went to slip on my apron at the back.