Maia Mitchell Fanfic [In Editing]

Chapter 19

Oh shiz. Ok I'm still trying to clean my language up but that moment was because of... Jared. I immediately jerked his arm off of me and felt the tears coming. I had this lump in my throat where it hurt so bad that if I say a word I'll stutter and start the hiccups. I looked at Riker and said "I know you were trying to accomplish something. But please d-d-Don't br-bring B-b-Blake into th-this." I stuttered the last part. Blake was always a sore subject for me. I could tell the resemblance though. Jared had Blake's shaggy brown hair but he spiked it up and Blake left his down. Blake had crystal blue eyes and Jared had ice cold eyes. Blake was the same height as Jared but Blake was more kind, well at least to me. The struggle with him, it's like looking at Blake which is dead. I let one tear come out. And took a deep breath which ended up in hiccups. I couldn't do it anymore and said "I hate you and your brother. He left me and... Never said goodbye." I stopped and started pacing around fast trying to calm down, but failed and said "This is all my fault he didn't trust me. I should've had him trust me." I looked back at Jared and reminded myskef that he's Jared not Blake, and yet I still said "I love you. Don't forget that. I messed up big time, and I'm sorry." Then I stormed out of the living room to outside. Ok not a good choice but I couldn't handle the tension in there. Stupid ass, my emotions took over and I thought Jared was Blake. A few minutes later I heard the door open and close. "Hey your not the only one hurt. He didn't tell me either and I blame myself every day. Who do you think taught Blake the bad boy rep? I'm as heartbroken as you are." Jared said sad then that turned into anger. How dare he get mad at me he didn't love Blake like I did. I hated how he said he was haertbrokeb too making me feel selfish but I can't just let him get mad at me. But I let it out anyway. I cried and Jared let it go too and enveloped me in his arms. 10 minutes later I finally realized what I was doing. I wanted to push his chest but I wanted him to hold me closer. I was scared. I mean he is Blake's brother and what if I make a slip up. Usually the guy says his ex girlfriends name or whatever and the girl gets mad and they brake up. Or the girl finds out that her boyfriend has feelings for his ex still. I couldn't handle that, yeah he wasn't Blake but still I could see it in him and I can't stand to see Blake or his brother sad. So I guess that means I can't have any crushes on Riker or anyone. That's a relief. But again I'm scared still, I mean blood can carry that stuff and it goes in families and what if Jared has it too I couldn't handle it. Scared. So I guess my brain wins. I pushed him off slowly just to where I could see him and he could see me also to where we had enough space. "Look, Jared this was a moment but I can't do this with you ok. I just can't, I know it's not a good enough reason but give me time please. Its not fair-" "Woah don't get ahead of yourself there we barely met and if I didn't help you then that would make me a ass. So this wasn't a Moment or whatever got it?" He said interrupting me. Oh again great dude your ruining the moment. I was angry. That was a moment and I was in a special spot right there, but I couldn't blame him I kinda got carried away, but still the anger won. I pushed him fully off me and rolled my eyes. He can not get the point can he? Blake would've- no stop talking about Blake. I got myself collected before opening the door. It opened but no one was here or I couldn't hear any one. Jared came up behind me and I guickly opened the door fully so I wouldn't be close to him. I just rolled my eyes which he couldn't see, and someone came up and bumped into me. It was April and Rydel. Jared was still behind me and shoved past me not saying anything. I can't say casual Jared but I will be saying it pretty soon. I focused my attention back to my new friends and Rydel started first. "So what happened tell me the details." And April nodded her eyes wide. I smiled at their excitement and nodded pulling them to the living room getting comfortable on a couch and April sat on the right loveseat while Rydel sat in the leather armchair on my left. They looked so serious it looked like a intervention. I laughed at my mind and said "Well you see, Blake and I had... A past that contained I love you's and intercourse and sweet dates." Arpil quickly said "was he good?" I stopped especially for her knowing she would say something and indeed she did. "Well you know when you love someone they can't be bad but yes he was very good" She put her head down a little at her silly question. I rolled my eyes playfully and continued. "When we first met he was a bad boy. He would make these silly jokes, pick on me and I didn't mind. But it got more serious and I got tired of it and one day stood up for myself. That was when we weren't to close remember that April so didn't tell you. So he then started picking on me more. Our thing was he would call me princess or when he is sweet sometimes Charlotte. Then it started getting serious and we were the 'it' couple of our school. A little later he started getting sick but he kept on reminding me he was ok. Then he started shutting me out and it went downhill from there. I did a couple things out of anger... and we broke up. I took it hard very, and a week later I received a letter from the Lane family. Blake's family. It said he had cancer within the month this all happened and did not survive." I chocked on that part but contineued taking breaks here and there. "Of course I went and I didn't see Jared there, and I never noticed him. Whenever I was at the Lane's I wouldn't see Jared and Blake never talked or told me about having siblings. Then Jared came here and looked like Blake but I never noticed until... Now." I stopped from saying anymore and said "Ok that's it." And got up. What a day I say.