Worlds Collide

Explanations.

I kept my head down, so much so that I didn't see Lorenzo and Jacob until it was too late. I collided with them as I turned the corner down the hallway. I was heading for the courtyard.

I needed space, I needed air. I needed to think.

"Watch it." Lorenzo grunted and I glared at him, I didn't say anything as I shoved past him.

"Wait Y/n, what's wrong?" Jacob said, grabbing for my shoulder, I shrugged him off.

"Fuck off Jacob, why don't you and Lorenzo piss off for once." I spat but neither looked shocked by my hostility.

"What the fuck's got your knickers in a twist?" Lorenzo said to himself more than anyone but for some reason... It just- it got under my skin.

"I'll tell you fucking why, because- because..." I trailed off, Mattheo hated me, he discarded our friendship. What had I done? What had I done? What the fuck did I do?  "I fucked up, I just don't know how to fix it."

"Start from the beginning, maybe an outside perspective might help." Lorenzo sighed, Jacob nodded.

"Don't worry, you better get to bed before the rest of your possy sends a search party." I snap and Jacob looks down.

"Y/n, we-" Lorenzo began but I didn't want to listen to either of them anymore.

"Goodnight." And walked away.

*Regulus POV*

"Jesus christ Mattheo, you should have just pushed her down some stairs. That would have been less painful." I snap, rubbing my face. I can't get the look on her face out of my goddamn head.

"Shut the fuck up Regulus, you knew i had to. Don't make this any harder than it has to be. I had no fucking choice!" He yells, tears welling in his eyes. "I love her, you know." He whispers as he sits on his bed.

"Yeah I know, I can tell. You're not very subtle." That makes him chuckle through his sniffles. "I think she loved you too." I feel a pain in my chest and I know exactly what it is. Jealousy.

"Not after tonight, you better go after her. She's going to need you." I nod and move to grab a jacket. "Remember our promise, be there for her and she can never know about the letter." Mattheo instructs.

"Why not? Maybe telling her about it was the smarter idea. She might have understood, we shouldn't have done that to her, Mattheo."

"We? We did that to her? Nah, no, you haven't fucked up yet. You haven't done anything. Now go, find her." And I move for the door but two figures are already there.

"What the bloody hell do you two want?" Mattheo asked, Lorenzo and Jacob came in, Jacob shutting the door behind them.

"What the fuck happened?" Jacob asks softly as he looks at Mattheo, you can tell he's been crying.

"Nothing." I answer.

"We just ran into Y/n, literally." Lorenzo adds,

"Fuck." I move for the door but Jacob gets in the way.

"What the hell did you two do?" He asks, since when did he care about her?

"Move, I gotta go find her." I say and try to move him but he brushes me off.

"Not until you tell us what happened."

"What did she say?" Mattheo asks.

"Well she looked pretty upset and when we asked her what was wrong she said she fucked up and that she didn't know how to fix it." Lorenzo explained, Mattheo held a glass in his hand and threw it at the wall. Fuck, she's blaming herself.

"Fuck!" Mattheo yells.

"Woah, woah. Mattheo calm down, now can someone please just tell us for christ's sake." Lorenzo said, his eyes wide.

"I er- got a letter from my dad, I have to make Y/n hate me or he'll kill her." Mattheo's voice broke and I hugged him. He hugged me back and I felt truly sorry for him. It hurt to see him like this. He truly does love her.

"Go, go find her. Please Regulus."

"Did you guys see which way she went?" I asked Jacob and Lorenzo, both looking shocked and a little alarmed.

"She was heading for the courtyard but I think she normally takes that path down to the forest sometimes so she might be there." Jacob explains and Mattheo's face goes slack.

"Mattheo, what is it?" Lorenzo asked.

"Oh fuck. Remember the night Y/n found you in the woods?" He asked me and I nodded, how could I forget, "She got you out of there because there are certain creatures in there that wouldn't hesitate to kill you and it's unbelievably easy to get lost. That's why it's forbidden." He says all at once. He's panicking, what's going on?

"Y/n would never tell anyone this or ever say it out loud but she's suicidal." Mattheo says and we don't know what to say.

"Are you saying that the night she found me, she was planning on killing herself?" I could feel my heart in my throat.

"She told me that she was on her way back when she found you. She wasn't going to do it because we made a promise months ago that she'd never leave me behind but now that I've done... I said what I said- she might..."

"Wait what?" Jacob yelled as Mattheo and I ran past him.

"We gotta find Y/n." I say, dead serious.

I can't lose her. I won't.