Black And Grey

26. She's back

My car is unavailable, I've been waiting for a bus for about twenty minutes,but none.

So,I begin to walk.. yes,I'm walking.

I'm walking so fast because I don't know why Amanda sent that text and who it was referring to,but my mind already knows something happened to mom..

Immediately I get into the hospital,I stop to catch my breath and I receive some stares from people.

I call Amanda to ask where they are. She tells me the room number and I run up the stairs.

I feel like I could collapse soon.

When I open the door,Amanda,her mom and my mother are in this room.

Mom is on the bed while Amanda and her mom are both on individual chairs with horrified and sad looks on their faces.

"Jessy," Amanda gets up when she sees me. "Mom,she...."

"She went unconscious" Amanda's mom finishes.

"What? Why?"

"I don't know," Amanda sighs. "I went to give her some food when I noticed"

"So what's wrong with her?" I ask

"It's the cancer,dear. It's growing stronger everyday" Amanda's mom says.

"But she still has time, right?"

"I don't know,Jessy. I thought so too,but with everything the doctor said,I don't think so"

"She's suffering...and I can't do anything about it... I'm just standing here like the useless daughter I've always been!" I don't know when my leg kicks the wall in front of me. The anger in me is boiling so fast and high that I think I might blow up.

Mom looks very skinny now,her vibrant cheeks are lessening.

"But she's out of danger right?" I ask quietly.

"The doctor said she is"

"But she has to stay here for now,just so they can closely monitor her" Amanda adds and I nod,. But my mind isn't with them at all.

****
My mind is racing and I can feel my anger building up twice as tall.

The past few weeks or months, I'd say I hadn't been getting angry like I used to,but right now,I feel like plucking out my hair.

I wish mom could be fine.

But sadly,my life is not a movie.

Doctor told me she needed to rest,he told me to come back in the morning.

I argued but he made me understand that it's all for her good.

So,I complied and left

I'll be there as early as I can tomorrow morning.

Amanda and her mom were so helpful today and I thanked them.

Right now,I'm in Justin's house.

He has been talking about a game idea he has or was it a study platform?

I honestly cannot remember.

"Jess?"

"Yes?" I stare at him. Confusion written allover him.

"Were you listening? I was thinking of things to do for your birthday"

Oooh, that's what he was talking about.

"I spaced out,I'm sorry" I say and begin to pick at my nails.

He moves closer to me on the couch and I continue to stare at my nails.