⧗ 𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑀𝑦𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝐷𝑖𝑠𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒⧗

𝐹𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑦 𝐻𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑦！

Natasha's Pov:

Everything was still a bit weirded for me, one minute I was slipping out of Clint's hands to my death and the next I'm in Steve's arms as tears of joy?I think stream down his cheeks and smiles at me. He just told me how glad he was that I'm back and then we were travelling through time back to the future to be welcomed by the team who had tears welling up in the eyes. And for some reason one of Tony and Bruce's arms were in bandages and casts, I was so confused.

Until they told me everything like I mean everything, I can't believe Yelena fought Clint! She named her dog FANNY!!! She's got a dog!!! And also visions back! Like since when? But I feel really bad that Wanda had to go through the west view situation all by herself so I gave her a big hug when she told me about that, but know she's happy that everyone's back.

Tony snapped and Bruce geez I missed so much! They told me about the fight against Thanos, I kinda wish I saw that I would have led all the women to end Thanos!

But I knew they would win that's why I sacrificed my life because I knew they would succeed and also because Clint has kids and a family.

Even though it's been three weeks after I came back alive I'm still quit sore like every were, note to self try not to jump of a cliff. But Fury's not letting me on missions for another two weeks like how stupid is that! Yes I still can't fully fight but I say I'm pretty good I've only fainted like four times each week? But everyone agrees with Fury.

General Ross is not so happy I'm alive which makes me smirk knowing he's annoyed because of me. But the good thing is Steve!

Me and him have been hanging out lots lately, since I can't go on missions, steve always hangs out with me when he's not on his missions. Saturday is my favourite day because me and him always have a movie night on that day and usually we both end up falling asleep on each other. He's SUPPER protected of me since I've come back and is still hurt from cliff jumping, he makes sure I don't over do myself in training or if I look tired he'll make sure I'm fine or take me to sleep.

But I can't sleep, my nightmares are back and there not leaving anytime soon, knowing that I'm back alive means my ledger is still there. I'm so glad that stark has got soundproof rooms because I would wake everyone up with my screams and I don't need everyone fussing over me, I'm made of marble not glass, that's fragile and I'm not I'm a rock nothing hurts me but I can hurt them.

So at night I go to the ballet room that stark installed for me, it's quit hidden so no one knows about it and I threatened Tony to not tell anyone. I usually dance till my feet bleed or I'm about to pass out, it makes me tougher. But some nights I go to train but because basically everyone on the team have nightmares sometimes there down there so that burst my plan.

Clint and Tony don't live at the compound anymore, Clint visits every weekend or sometimes in the week but me and him basically chat on the phone everyday, and Tony shows up about every two or three days. And sometimes brings Morgan or asks me to look after her which I love doing! She's so cute and I am her god mother and I'm also Lila and Nathanial's God mother. I make sure I spoil them because there the closest thing to a child for me since I was sterilised at the age sixteen, that's one of my worst memories. I'm a monster and Bruce basically agreed with me when I told him about it, since the I've told no one about it.

It protects me from getting hurt. Steve would never date me he likes Sharon and Peggy and there not sterilised like me, he probably wants a family when I can't give him one, but at least I got Morgan, Cooper, Lila, Nathanial, Peter and Wanda there like my kids I have to protect them. And I guess Kate because she's around Yelena's age.

Clint and others say I'm way over protective of Yelena but I just care for her. Im not making the same mistake I maid nearly thirty years ago, it still haunts me to this day, I could of shot them and Yelena wouldn't have to go through what I did. But she's got one of the biggest hearts I know and she's super funny! But she's obsessed with Mac and cheese! And she puts hot sauce on it, ewe that's disgusting. But she ships me with Steve!

Everyone does they call it 'Romanogers' They even made a twitter and instagram account of a club that ships me and Steve. Surprisingly lots and when I say lots I mean lots, of people joined. I mean yes I like Steve's smile, laugh, personality, abs, eyes. Lips, his heart, how he's confused on modern stuff, basically everything about him. Doesn't!!! Mean I like him that's stupid, loves for children.

But it's been three weeks nearly four, since I came back from the dead and this week has been feeling of. I feel like someone's watching my every move? But no one's there and when I go to the shops or just anywhere I feel like there's a shadow that follows me. I'm probably just overthinking since the whole alive thing is quit confusing and getting to my head.

But I don't know and some people are mad I'm alive but I get it! I'm the black widow I kill innocent people, I've got the biggest ledger to ever live meanwhile my teammates are pure innocence, so if someone was following me it's probably just a hater trying to get to me but I doubt it, nothing passes me I'm the black widow. I'm just overthink lots.

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Hope you like the first chapter,sorry if there are any grammar or spelling mistakes.