When dark illuminate | ✎

|9| Never knew he was me until now

❝ I wouldn't have believed it
if I wouldn't have seen the
same raw emotions
in his eyes too ❞

. . .

Well, eyes are the most beautiful creation in anyone's body. Don't you agree?

Why wouldn't they? You see this beautiful world with it even though' sometimes they are wrapped in Black & White.

What if their vision itself gets blurry? How would you deal with it? Irritated, fussing over why can't you see clearly?

I don't remember my first time with the blurred vision. To be exact, it wasn't blurry after all. Maybe it was just fog when I was running too fast. But with the passing time, maybe the distance started to grow.

After almost two years of suffering, I finally got it cleared that this is not something I can handle on my own anymore.

So, I got gifted with two new brand eyes. Can you guess it? It's the glasses, people like to call. Some people think it's cool to wear it. Whereas some think it's a stain on their look. Why wouldn't they? After all, people are adamant to make them feel it.

All the thoughts flew right there, when these glasses put right through my eyes - what did I feel? Nothing, just weird.

Now, here comes another big misconception. People think, those who wear glasses, they can't see without it. Duh— we can see without it. It just depends on your eye range.

Over the years, even with all the remarks of people, it has become one of my needs. Maybe the visit with an ophthalmologist still seems bothersome.

I'm just looking thoroughly. Now, I have a bad habit of observance. People are busy in their world. The loud chatter from the television can be heard. But there's no focus. Everyone is mingling with the appointment or either way on their phone.

These appointments always make me sick — but what can I do? My mum wouldn't spare me even though I would say, I am fine for the thousands of times. It's not her fault as well. It's a regular check up once in a year.

I always wonder why there are only aged people? I mean, maybe other people around my age don't have the same problem as me. I just shrugged it off.

Meanwhile, a lady took the place beside me. I look up & see her face. It feels like she isn't very old, but the eyes, wrinkles said she has seen enough things in her life.

I just give her a smile. Being an introvert, I ain't chatty let alone with a stranger. After a while, the lady asked me if I were alone.

I just said, my mum is right over there. When I asked her the same question, she said she's here with her daughter. After the formal questions, she asked about the glasses.

Maybe her next statement was out of place. "Maybe you study too much, that's why your eyes got strained."

Honestly speaking, maybe she didn't mean like that. But if only I knew, maybe I was destined for it, nothing else. I have just given her a lazy smile.

Meanwhile, it is my number now. So, I got inside. There are always two sections, where the number of my eyes gets checked for shortsighted. The last one is always with the ophthalmologist.

I sit there in a chair, whereas the other patients are getting checked. The clear voice of him; the ophthalmologist — can be heard vividly. His voice is authentic. Even at this age, he is speaking like he is delivering news on some news channel.

At first, I was shocked to hear about one of my first appointments. After looking here & there, the boy next to me caught my interest.

His legs are bouncing. Since, the guardian isn't allowed in the first section, he is alone as well like me.

The rubbing hands, slight sweat, the anticipation in his eyes — for once it felt like it wasn't him. It was me. Three years ago, I was in the same situation as him.

Scared of what's gonna happen, fear of not being able to see what's gonna happen. There was no one to share the same fear, same anticipation. I was just a lost girl with no idea of what to do.

His bouncing legs brought me out of my daze.

I asked him, what's your name?

Now, the sudden question startled him. But nevertheless he answered. He was in eighth grade, a few years younger than me.

I didn't ask any further questions, but this sudden friction put him at ease, at least a little bit.

But the fear is still there. As if he needs someone there right now. I don't know, Maybe the manager can see it clearly as well. He offered to ask for his father to come, the face lit up instantly.

His father came. And what I have seen — maybe it's the most adorable scene in the world. He clutched his father's hand tightly. In return, his father smiled at him & put arm around him.

For the first time, in this half an hour relief was shown in that boy's face. It's like, he has no fears, he has someone whom he can trust wholeheartedly.

I smiled at the scenery and closed my eyes to savour the moments.

Today I learned one thing, emotions vary from person to person. Maybe the face gets changed, maybe the roles get reversed. But the feelings, it's always the same.

If it wasn't, maybe I wouldn't have seen the same emotions in his eyes. For a second, he was me. I was him once upon a time.

Only our circumstances got different. Only he has someone today, I had none. But both are needed in our life. Maybe I needed to face alone, but with him — it's not needed.

With that being said, there will be many moments in our life, where we need to go through alone, but that doesn't mean others have to go through the same.

It always feels right, when someone is there beside you, and there's nothing wrong in calling out to them.

━━━━━━━

Boring, right? What if I say, it's real?