Tavington awoke the next morning and realized that what had happened the night before had not been a dream. Juliana had come into his bedroom while he'd been bathing, and things had seemed to spiral out of control between them from there. They'd spent an intense night together, and now Juliana was in his bed, in his arms, sleeping serenely.
Tavington closed his eyes and tried to gather his thoughts. He couldn't even lie to himself; last night had been something he'd both wanted and needed. It had been far too long since he'd been with a woman. He had needed to feel that kind of physical connection again. But he knew it had all been more than just physical. He hadn't wanted to be with just any woman; he'd wanted to be with Juliana.
He sighed internally, frustrated that he'd once again failed to control his own feelings. What kind of ramifications would his weaknesses create for him, now? It wasn't actually possible that this ... whatever it was he had with Juliana would lead to anywhere - was it? It couldn't. She was a slave, and he was her master. This was the most that would come of it, he decided, and this time would be the only time. It had to be.
Tavington did still have Caroline to consider. Maybe she would provide a way out of this emotional mess he'd created for himself. He'd met Caroline Staton at a dinner party the previous summer and had corresponded regularly with her in the time since. Many already assumed they were courting, and perhaps they were, in the vaguest sense of the word. Perhaps, Tavington mused, he should allow their relationship to progress to another level.
Yes, Tavington encouraged himself. If he had someone else to lavish his attention and affection on, his mind wouldn't linger on Juliana, and his problem would find a cure for itself. He looked down at Juliana. He had to distance himself from her. That was the key, the answer. It was the only way it would all work out. Another thought along those same lines found its way into his head: should he simply get rid of her? Was that the answer? To sell her?
He slowly slid out from underneath Juliana, not wanting to wake her. Nevertheless, as soon as he'd made it across the room to the dresser and pulled on a clean pair of breeches, Juliana stirred to a waking state. Tavington's back was to her, but he heard her behind him, moving on the bed.
Juliana blinked a few times and rubbed away the bleariness temporarily clouding her vision. She looked across the room and saw Tavington pulling his uniform on. "You're going back?" she asked.
"I'm needed back at base," Tavington said curtly, not bothering to turn and face her. He slipped his arms into a fresh uniform shirt.
"But I thought you said you had a few days off?" Juliana said. She pushed herself up to a seated position on the bed.
"Pardon me for following orders," Tavington snapped. "The last time I checked, I don't require your blessing to follow the orders handed down to me."
Juliana blinked, momentarily taken aback by the change that had seemed to occur in Tavington at some point during the night. "No. Of course you don't need my blessing." The tone of her voice manifested a change in her demeanor as well. She slid out of bed and began to gather her own clothing. She began to pull on her dress. "You apparently don't need me for anything except being an ornament for you to parade around at parties and for something to provide entertainment in your bed."
Tavington whirled around to finally face her. "What did you say?" he demanded.
"You heard me. Those are the only reasons you keep me around." Juliana picked up a few more items of clothing, some of them hers, some of them Tavington's. Then, she stopped abruptly and turned to Tavington. "Are you even capable of feeling, Colonel?" she asked.
"What concern is to you?" Tavington spat.
"It's my concern because it's my feelings that are involved," Juliana retorted. "Every time we take a step forward together, it's as if you take two giant steps backward." She walked across the room to retrieve more articles of clothing.
YOU ARE READING
Possession
FanfictionFor Juliana Harris, life had always been cut and dry: People were Loyalists or Rebels, they were good or bad, they were master or slave. That perception of life changes suddenly one night...