Once I climbed into the car, the closeness is overwhelming and I wanted to kiss him again, I could sense he feels it too because he starts to make idle chit chat about a pop quiz he has for Biology. I felt brave and ask him if he enjoyed kissing me. He quickly said yes, and tells me I look lovely. My brain and my mouth were not working properly because I tell him to pull over, he does but he is super stunned by this comment. I take my seatbelt off and just kiss him, I do not know why I did it but I wanted too because he is so beautiful and wants me. We kiss with so much passion as if we need each other on some deeper level. Derek lets go first and tells me, I know you felt that, but I just laugh it off because that is a topic I am not ready for. We decide to meet after-school. Derek smiles and pulls me closer to tell me he will go with the flow. He sets the car on drive and off we go. Once we get to school, he parks, we both take a deep breath and I can see all eyes are on us. He leans over, and brushes his lips against mine, and tells me lets go have a good day sunshine. In that moment I wanted him but I just opened by door and braced myself for stares. I do not know who this person with this sass deep within me is but I like it.I decide to be adventurous and hold his hand as he is walking me to class. His hand feels nice on mine. His fingers are soft against mine. A lot of people are staring at us, he never once drops his hand from mine. I am stunned in silence because I truly can not believe this is happening. We walk in silence which is enough for us as we know how we are feeling in the moment. Derek's friends were staring at him, but he waves them off. I let go of his hand and face him. Before I could he say anything he grabs my face and plants a kiss on my lips, and leaves me with a goodbye in front of my class.
Marie was all over me, she told me everyone thinks we are together. I laughed it off and tell her we are just friends. After all the paranoia I had she goes on about how Derek can be messing with me. Marie starts gushing about how super confident I look and how much better I dress. Marie always has the best intentions, over the summer she came to see me in New York and met Adam. She loved New York and how much of an impact it made on my overall appearance. I want to tell her everything that occurred this morning, I just want to keep Derek to myself for a while because for all know I can wake up from this dream. To calm her down, I agree with everything and bring up Paul. Paul is Marie's longtime boyfriend. She is obsessed with Paul, they starting dating Marie's freshman year and have been inseparable ever since. He is a great guy and always gives her space, this year he started college. I know this has to be hard for both of them as they decided to continue a long distance relationship. Before this school year started it was always us three hanging out, I always felt like they dragged me along, to not make me feel alone. I tended to just leave them alone and Marie would always have time for me. Paul and I hung out without Marie as well, which was nice because we grew up together. Paul and I were best friends ever since I can remember. I always thought of him as a brother I always wanted. He's a great person, and I was happy he found love with Marie. I do miss him at times because we always had weekly friend dates to just be ourselves without Marie. I do not have the heart to tell Marie, he's struggling with his relationship because he wants to have a full college experience.
Good thing about Paul is he has decided to stay in Seattle for college and is only 45 minutes to an hour away. Marie has not acknowledged the status of the relationship because I know it is hard for her to say. I respect it and will always be supportive. Marie starts to tell me how she is going to go see Paul at college over the weekend, I am barely listening because I start to think about that amazing kiss. Before parting ways when the bell rings, I promise her I will be careful and We decide to have lunch as she was busy yesterday with drama club. A reminder I need to be more active during my debate team meetings. The previous school year took a toll on all my social club gatherings and on my emotional state. Good school year ahead, is my new motto. Plus after this year, I will kiss high school goodbye.
