MAYBE ITS BETTER TO LET GO

Chapter 1

⚠️Trigger warning ⚠️ ⚠️ contains abusive content, mention of drugs ect⚠️

       My name's Rain, I know, how depressing? But I kinda like it, it suits me. I'm 16, my mother died when I was 12, I know what you're thinking, "no child should be without a mother'"  or perhaps you're thinking "that's so sad" but it's not. She abused me. I've been taken to the ER a total of 34 times in my lifetime, and not because of sports, or broken bones, or typical idiotic kid stuff, but because my mother would beat me if I did something that wasn't to her liking. I remember one time when I was 8, I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth, when my mother came into the bathroom, screaming at me, because I didn't do something I was told to do. I told her that I was sorry, and that I'd do it when I finished brushing my teeth, but that didn't satisfy her, she grabbed me by the hair on my head and bashed my head on the sink. I went to the ER diagnosed with a concussion and mild memory loss, but no amount of brain damage  could make me forget the psychotic things she did to me. When the doctor asked how I got the injury, my mom told him I slipped, while getting out of the shower, and hit my head on the sink. I wish that was what happened, if that were the case I would have less emotional damage. My dad wasn't around much when I was younger, after the divorce I only got to see him once every 3 weeks, my mom timed the abuse perfectly. During the week that I was supposed to see my dad she would only give me heavy bruises that I could cover up with makeup. Of course there was a reason behind all of this abuse. Not a logical reason but it's not like she just beat kids for fun. No she did drugs, snorted coke and molly on a weekly basis. Dad knew this but he didn't know it led to his daughter being beaten bloody. In fact, no one ever found out. EVER. Not even to this day.

           I'm much happier now, I mean I'm still fucked up in the head, but I'm able to actually have fun without worrying about avoiding death when I get home. Kinda fucked up that that's like a victory to me. Anyway that's my childhood story, now that we're all caught up, I think we can resume.

           I woke that morning to my alarm blaring in my ear, ugh I hated school. It wasn't about education and learning. I was good at that part of school, in fact, when starting highschool I got into honors history and English literature classes, so that wasn't the problem. No it was the people. I hated people. "Morning Hun" I was greeted with a kiss on the head by my dad when I walked downstairs. "Morning dad" I smiled at him. "Breakfast?" He asked. A pan of bacon in his hand. "Yeah" I smiled at sat down at the table. "So how's school going?" Dad asked while digging into a plate of bacon and eggs. "It's...ya know just typical school" that was an understatement. "So shitty?" He asked, with a smirk on his face.  "That's about right" I laughed. "School sucked, but it got me a good job, so it was kinda worth it" he laughed too. "Did you have friends?" I asked "a few" he answered "I don't, but I like the classes so I guess that's good" I looked down at my plate. "Don't worry sweetie, someone will come along and notice my sweet girl, and they will forever regret not noticing sooner" he squeezed my hand and smiled. "Thanks dad" I smiled back. "I hope you have a good day, I'm off to school" I kissed his cheek and walked out the door.

          When I got to school, everyone was assembled in the cafeteria, watching something and chanting. I wandered in that direction out of curiosity, but you know what they say, curiosity killed the cat. And just like that as soon as I entered the cafeteria something hard struck my cheek, and all I felt was pain. I fell to the floor unaware of what was happening. "Rain" I faintly heard. "Rain? are you ok?" It was a male voice "let me help you" he said and helped me to my feet. I was a little dizzy but I could see clearly again. He was tall, with glasses and dark hair. His green eyes sparkled like emeralds. 'oh good God Rain get a grip' I shook those thoughts out of my head and said "uh thanks, I didn't realize there was a fight going on. Uh have I met you? How do you know my name?" I asked "uh yeah" he looked to be thinking for a moment "we have algebra together" he finally said "oh right. I think I remember now. Um it's Brenden right?" I asked guessing his name. He shook his head "Brayden?" I asked another name. Finally he held out his hand and said "I'm Josh" he smiled again. "Josh" I repeated his name and shook his hand. "Nice to meet you" I smiled.

         After that whole incident in the cafeteria I was hoping my day would get better. I walked with Josh to first period, I realized now we actually had a lot of classes together, which was weird I didn't seem to recognize him from any of them. Unfortunately we didn't have first period together. I had chemistry whereas he had biology. We stopped outside my classroom. "I'll see you later" Josh said "yeah" I smiled. Maybe today wouldn't be so bad after all.