Crazy & In Love

(8) Beginner's Love.

My First Love ~ Avant & KeKe Wyatt

"She came out, looking like the Goddess she is–" the pages in my mind flick back to two nights ago. "–we walked hand in hand and talked...all night." She'll be the death of me. Just the memory of her sends me into a frenzy. "–and you wouldn't believe it! She forgave me." I'm still stoked about my night with Udaya and the whole forgiving me fiasco, my blood pressure is still through the roof.

I've checked.

When we see each other these days, whether it be in the lift or lobby, she looks at me directly, never diverting her gaze. Not my forehead...Not behind me or on the floor.
In my eyes.
She smiles too.
It's warm and kind and it makes her eyes crinkle at the corners.

"Please, stop." I'm pulled from my mirage of Udaya's plump lips by a strained voice. Turning, I face the idiot I have taped to the chair. The middle-aged man, named Fredrick, has salty tears rolling down his cheeks.
Cheeks that I slit open a while ago, so...that's gotta sting. We've done a lot in our time together. I picked him up a few hours ago from a brothel just off Brooklyn bridge.

Found the bastard trying to rape one of the girls and he dared to ask if I wanted to join. Short blonde hair is sticking to his wrinkled forehead and his green eyes are bouncing around the room, searching for an escape. I dragged his ass here to question, but not before paying off the lady for her troubles. God, If there was a ranking to assassins, which there is, he'd be bottom barrel.

"Shhh, don't cry. It's going to be okay." His face lights up with hope at my soft tone. Butterflies are crowding my stomach as we approach the big finale. I step closer, carefully not to set off his alarms."I just need you to tell me where Vista is, then we can go out separate ways." He shakes his head, a sign of decline and disrespect. I sigh with a heavy heart. I wanted to be good tonight. I drop my nice cop act, which was never really there, to be honest, and yank the four-inch blade, I hammered into his kneecap, out. His scream scratches at the walls of the warehouse.

I hiss. "That one was almost as loud as when I first put it in the–" I halt my sentence to listen to the high-pitched sound of droplets hitting the floor from underneath the metal chair. "Did you just piss yourself, Buddy?" Oh for fuck sake, grow up. He's acting like I drilled into the actual thing. I mean I could have, but I was in a good mood from the other night with my Princess. "Look here Bud, you need to speed this up, I've got places to be and a special woman to see." He's still sobbing. I'm starting to get a migraine between my brows.

Tonight's the Fenty show and I refuse to miss my Baby's walk. I've never missed a single one since we met.

My Target is Miguel Vista. The head of the Vermuda Cartel. He attacked two of my shipments this week, causing me a loss of just under two million. Regardless of whether the amounts are making a dent in my pockets, he's still trying to wind me up. So, call me a pop-up toy cause I'm there. Those two shipments were important as I was using them to begin the process of forming a new alliance with the Italians. They asked for some new toys and I promised to deliver them. Now I look like a fucking unorganised hillbilly.

I am not unorganised.

The grapevine told me that the person they hired went by the name Big Grain. I can't even begin to think of the thought process that went into creating that name. I mean...is it because his bullets are small and his hands are huge. Maybe he thinks he's big because he goes down two sizes in his shirts to display his soft muscles.

My watch ticks in his silence and I realise I'm running out of time. "Okay, we'll do this the hard way then." My hand falls to the drill laying on the wheeled table to my right and his wails start up again.
I haven't even touched him yet.

I wonder what my Princess is up to.

"One more time ladies, then I'll leave you to relax a little before we start getting ready for the show." Anna announces. She's the fashion director who is helping Rihanna with tonight's show. We run through the burlesque-themed routine. It's less of a dance and more of a seduction routine. Before the catwalk, we'll be on a pyramid-type prop with multiple seats. This lingerie line aims to promote the art of seduction and feeling sexy in your own skin. So that's what we're showing off tonight. Ladies of all colours, shapes and sizes crowd the stage.

After we've gotten through that we head to our makeup rooms to shower and be beautified by the productions' artists. "Do you have anyone coming to see you walk tonight Pretty?" Mindy asks as she applies my lipgloss. "Yeah, my Fathers are coming." Knowingly she smiles before responding. "I know that....anyone else?" I turn to look up at her standing at my side. "No Mindy." I laugh. She mumbles something about me having a happy glow and she'll find out soon.

The next hour consists of me being swarmed by nail and hair artists as Mindy sets my face. My toes are shoved under the UV lamp by a dark-skinned lady and my hands are worked on by a white lady I've seen on Instagram before. She's known for doing Kylie Kardashian's nails.

Eventually, my mind drifts to Tobias and why I didn't tell him about tonight. I didn't want him to have to shift around his busy schedule to the show tonight. But it gnaws at me. It would be nice to have him here. This is a regular occurrence. Every show I've walked since we separated, I've wondered if he'd come for me.

Rihanna walks into my room and stands behind me, staring at my reflection. "Perfect. You look beautiful." Her accent is thick as her eyes trail over my physique. "Thank you."Her eyes hitch at the faint scars along my arm. My stomach sinks. Is she going to ask me to cover them up? Our eyes meet in the mirror but she smiles nevertheless. "Come on, we're about to start soon." She holds out her hand for me and I take it. I'm led backstage to the changing section.

Welp here goes nothing.