Dressed For Death

CHAPTER 21

HAYDEN

I watched her walk away from me, and all I could do was watch. Watch as the woman I loved walked away from me because of the stupid shit I did.

I wanted to punch a wall and run after her, but I had to respect her wish to be left alone. She deserved that...

All the things she accused me of weren't true. Hell, I never loved anyone like I love her. She makes me want to be a better man. I tried to be less of an asshole for her because she deserves everything in the world.

The only reason I kept my mouth shut was because of the threat my director said to me. It's not the first time that douche bag said something like that to provoke me, mostly because he knew she was my sole weakness.

My director threatened to fire me if I did something stupid like smashing the coffee pot in my coworker's face again. And I would've done it a million times if it weren't for your voice telling me that you wouldn't want me to lose my job because of a stupid guy who just wants attention.

Damn you, Juliette. You truly are my weakness and I'm not ashamed of admitting it anymore.

I didn't feel like staying here anymore. I just wanted to get wasted at home and drown in my stupidity. I left the party without saying goodbye, not like some of them deserved that from me anyway.

"Another one?" The bartender asked me and I nodded. Another shot wouldn't hurt, right? I've been drinking for the past two hours. Switching from alcohol to water every now and then.

Mostly to punish myself for the pain I caused Juliette. God, I'm so stupid. She deserved better than me...

I rapidly down the shot of tequila the bartender handed to me and dropped my head on the counter. It was probably full of germs, but I couldn't care less right now.

I banged my head a couple of times on it and I took out my phone from my pocket. No messages from her...

I scrolled through the tons of pictures I had of us. Most of them were taken by Juliette when she stole my phone. I smiled at every picture she took, but fuck... my heart was being tortured right now.

I drank the other shot and pressed on her contact and called her. It was a bad idea, but my brain wasn't rational enough to stop me right now.

I waited for her to answer. I didn't know what I would even say to her if she did answer my call. She'll probably ignore me and rightly so. And she did ignore me, she let my call go straight to her voicemail.

"I know you're mad at me and probably even furious that I called you... I'm sorry for everything that's happened tonight. You should know I would never use you in any way. I cannot even bare the thought of doing that to the woman I love the most in this entire world" I rambled so fast like I was vomiting words.

"Yep, I love you even if you probably don't, but it's okay. I'll never hate you for that. Anyways, I don't know why I called, but I'm really sorry sunshine" I hung up and rested my head back on the counter.

I hated myself.
I hated my job.
I hated my coworkers.
I hated not being able to spend less than a day without her and missing her like hell.
I just hated everything...
And I lost everything by my own doing.