Project Nr. 1

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As I was walking through the halls of my high school, after the first meeting with Tom Bront, I realized something. I was a pretty pathetic person and I couldn't even communicate with a completely normal person. I was weak in the stomach and I simply didn't have the guts to even look him in the eyes. They were so intense and... I don't know. He is just pretty intense. Always smiling and laughing and being so full of energy. I couldn't even do that for ten minutes, but he still jumps around 24/7. But that is what makes him special, I guess. Is that just an act? Hiding something from the world? From his friend? Maybe he had a dark past and copes with it by being the assistant of the sun? Man, there are really a lot of questions surrounding him. Or maybe I just overthink everything he does...

Nana was clearly drooling over Scylar, as I was placing my lunch next to hers. She had a faint smile on her lips. "Do you want to talk to him?" I innocently asked her. She shook her head, deprived of any energy. "No. But- Ugh, look at him! Isn't he hot?" I mustered him. In close up, he was surely a sight for sore eyes, but simply not my type. In like... everything. He was Scylar. Scylar Brown. I still wondered, how someone like Nana, a genuine person, could even fall in love with that- something. "You do still remember, when he dumped his entire food over you in 8th grade, right? Or as he left you for Rosie Jonson? Or as he-" "Shhhhhh- I don't want to hear that Henry." She shushed me with her finger. I grinned and bit into my apple. "I am just saying, that he isn't a gentleman. Or even a halfway decent person... or even in any way a nice person." She rolled her eyes at me, like so often, and continued to goggle him up and down.

I goggled someone else. Someone who actually was a nice and caring person. Tom Bront just entered our well known eating hall and placed his lunch on his normal place. Right in front of the window. He was smiling and laughing again... actually, wasn't he like doing that all the time? "Ugh, I can't stand that Tom..." I snapped my head towards Nana. "WHAT?!" She laughed loudly and gathered a bit of attention from other students. "I mean, I think he personally is too much." "Too much of what?!" "Of an empath. Look, isn't it obvious? He is helping everybody and is smiling all the time and lets not forget, that he is friends with everybody in this school. Okay, except us probably." I looked at her with pure disbelieve written all over my face. "And why is that a problem?! He is a nice, genuine person, unlike you, and for that he is popular. It kind of seems like you envy him... are you jealous?!" She shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe. Doesn't make the fact better, that he is annoying."  "He isn't!" "Whatever you say." 

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"I'm home!" I yelled into the living room. My Mum was probably at her friends house, gambling, but you could never know. She liked to be there more than in our home. And that was because of my dad. They didn't get along well anymore. I think since I turned nine, they just lived their own life and drifted apart. Other lives and other affairs. I just hope, that they can afford the divorce soon. I mean, no one wants to live between a married couple, which isn't even talking to each other.

"How was your day?" My dad asked. He was sitting by the kitchen table and was rubbing his red eyes. He probably just woke up from a long nap. "Better that yous I assume?" He let out a muffled laugh and got himself a cup of coffee. "I can guaranty you, that that is certainly true." 

As soon as I got into my room I turned the volume of my speakers up. I didn't want to listen to anybody right now. Not even to my mum getting back and finding reasons to yell at my dad, oh wonder. I unintentionally drifted back to my ever first meeting with Tom today in art class. How his hair looked like... how his eyes gleamed, as soon as he smiled. How I turned red, as soon as he asked for my opinion. I turned and tossed around on my bed and wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. I needed to humble myself. Like, seriously. He was just asking for my opinion, because he wanted the group project to become a success. And I needed to stop thinking about him! God, you could tell, how obsessed I was with him. And I hope, nobody noticed. It's not like I hide my sexuality, I just don't want anybody to find out, who I really am. I had enough experience with bullying and for heavens sake, I don't want to break completely, because of who I truly am, which is being gay. Never in my whole entire life, will I be choosing this fate. 

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