Get A Room!

~:*:~ Twenty-Nine ~:*:~

Tanner

Layne and I were having a brunch date at this nice little diner just off of campus. Most of our time was just spent eating in silence because after a couple of failed attempts, we realized we had nothing new to talk about. It was a nice atmosphere and the food tasted great, but we needed more to make this date a success.

To my utter humiliation, it seemed that Jesse just had a knack for knowing when to show up in my life to turn everything upside down. He walked into the diner with a girl on his arm. He was about to usher her to a free table when he saw Layne and I. He smiled and waved playfully. I pretended not to notice him, but Layne practically shouted at the top of her lungs to bring him our way.

"Good morning, you two. Having a little after sex breakfast, I see?"

"What?! No!" We both protested in unison.

Jesse frowned in confusion as he pointed at our plates. "Then what the hell is this?"

I spoke in a hushed tone, not wanting to disturb other patrons as they ate peacefully. "It's just breakfast... it has nothing to do with-... with sex."

He laughed, "You're kidding me, right?!"

I crossed my arms defensively over my chest as I leaned back in my chair. "Well, what are you doing here?"

He pointed over his shoulder at the girl standing slightly behind him. "After sex breakfast... don't tell me that this is actually a planned date between you two?!"

"What if it is?" Layne didn't seem defensive, but rather embarrassed by our poor attempt.

Jesse let out a heavy sigh, like he couldn't believe he actually had to explain this to us. "Only married or sad couples go on breakfast dates because there's nothing exciting about them, and they typically don't lead to anything fun afterwards. I mean, have you ever heard of a couple having sex AFTER they sipped tea and munched on eggs benedict?" He laughed at the imagery before continuing, "Breakfast is something you offer your partner after a fun night out and a frisk in the sack. It's more of a reward than a part of the buildup... get it?"

I was about to say that it was none of his business, but then Layne spoke out first to completely contradict my thought. "So what should we have done?"

"For what?"

"A date."

Jesse waited with apprehension.

Layne continued, "Tanner already told me that you know about our... problems. And even if he didn't say anything, I'm sure you would have figured it out on your own given the way Tanner and I have been acting..."

Jesse gave me a strange look, probably gaging whether or not he should go on and give us advice. When I didn't fight back, he turned to his date and clasped onto her hands as he sweetly asked her to find them a table. He even gave her his order for flapjacks and a milkshake and told her to order whatever she wanted, no matter the cost. She was so in awe of his handsome face that she agreed without hesitation. After she glided away, he then pulled up a chair to our table and straddled it.

"For starters, you guys need to keep any meal dates to the evening because that's when people generally get into a romantic mood. You'll want to put an effort in if you have dinner at a restaurant... you'll shower, buy fancy new clothing to wear, do your hair and makeup, perhaps order a car service, and so on! As cliché as all these things sound, they actually help get you in the mood for a good time, both over dinner and after. I mean, just look at yourselves right now..." He gestured to our attire and hair, "... it looks like you both just rolled out of bed and NOT in the good way as I do."