Poisoned Stars

Chapter Two - The Sun At Night

'Have you got any gardening tools?'

'Probably not, don't think my ma was ever one for planting things,' I said and gestured at the grass around us.

'Fair,' Tom nodded, 'I'll have to grab some before I come back then,' he shrugged and took my cigarette from me. I glared at him and he pretended not to notice.

We were sitting in the garden again but the sun was up now, Tom latched on to his sunflower plan and intended to plant them tonight.

'I have work tonight, won't be here until two,' I lit another cigarette and took a long drag.

'I'll be waiting,' he finished his stolen cigarette and left.

I sat there until my alarm went off, pulling me from nothingness and telling me I had to get ready for work.

I worked in a bar a fifteen minute walk from my house, my parents had bought the house but it was left to me in my mothers will. I lived alone, my dad left years before she got sick and I never spoke to any of his other children. Or maybe they never spoke to me, given the choice I might have tried to have a relationship with them, but I was never given that option.

'What are you thinking about?' I heard Tom ask. He had pulled me from thoughts I had already forgotten so I shrugged in response and passed him the keys to my house. He nodded and accepted them. 'You ok?'

I nodded, but I wasn't sure. My mind kept going missing, it didn't make sense, I kept going missing.

'Do you want a drink?' I plastered my best customer service smile on.

'Nope,' he smiled back at me, I started pouring vodka. 'You know me too well.'

'Twelve years does that to a person,' I turned to grab a bottle from the fridge behind me.

'That makes me feel old...'

'You are old.' I slid his drink towards him and accepted the cash in his hand. 'And you should not know exactly how much your drink costs,' I rolled my eyes at him.

'I have to, makes life easier for you.'

'I'm not sure your drinking habits make life easier for anyone.' I put his money into the register and waited for denial.

Instead, he shrugged and sipped at his drink.

'Finn!' Andrew's cheerful voice came from my left. I wasn't sure I could deal with it today, other people's happiness seemed like a personal offence sometimes. It seemed like it existed just to mock me.

Andrew's personality seemed at complete odds with his appearance. He had a dark buzz cut, multiple facial piercings, and only ever wore black, a smile had permanent residence on his face and he was possibly the bubbliest person I had ever met.

'Hey,' I gave him a weak smile.

'How are you this fine evening?' he smiled and set about wiping down the bar top.

'Tired, how're you?' I leaned against the bar to face him.

'I am fantastic, the weather is really looking up.' His smile only grew and I felt jealousy fill my stomach, I had to turn back to Tom.

'You reckon you'll be done by half one?' he asked, obviously sensing my discomfort. I simply nodded.

'Oh, hi!' Andrew smiled at Tom, 'I'm Andrew, are you-' he cut himself off to look between the two of us and decided he wouldn't finish that sentence. 'I'm Andrew,' his smile wavered slightly.

'I'm Finn's best friend, Tom, we're planting sunflower seeds later,' he smiled brightly, 'do you like sunflowers?'

That was all Andrew needed to start a very energetic conversation with Tom so I left to find anything else to do.

At half one we walked out of the bar and Tom was waiting across the street, he waved his entire arm to let me know he was there then walked to join us.

As Andrew was locking to door Tom reached us.

'Are you joining us?' he smiled at Andrew. Joining us?

'What?' Andrew's face faltered briefly in confusion.

'Sunflowers,' was all Tom said in response and I shrugged when Andrew looked my way, favouring to light a cigarette than understand why Tom was inviting him to my house.

Andrew didn't say anything, possibly hoping for more explanation from Tom or some form of acceptance from me.

'I have alcohol,' I shrugged and walked away. I heard Tom and Andrew speaking quietly behind me before their steps followed.

When we got back to my house there was a big bag of compost and a plastic bag of what I assumed contained whatever else we needed to plant flowers sitting by the back door, I ignored them and lay on the grass. Tom grabbed them with help from Andrew and settled down beside me before emptying the contents of the bag. I stared at the sky.

I was vaguely aware of Tom and Andrew speaking beside me but I was lost in thoughts of swirling constellations.

I felt Tom's stare. I slowly moved my head to look back at him. I couldn't make out the look on his face or what it meant and I sat up without taking my eyes from him. He shrugged and turned to Andrew.

'I don't know.' He bit at his lip, a sign he was worried about something.

I looked between them to try and understand what I had missed but neither seemed like they were about to give an explanation.

Tom handed me a small spade, a packet of seeds, and told me to decide where we were planting them. I vaguely motioned at the garden to show I didn't care so he got up and decided himself that we would plant them by the wall of the house.

'When they grow really tall you'll be able to see them from the window.'

We planted them following Tom's instructions and when we were done he pulled me inside with them. Probably worried I would stay outside with the sky again.