All Along

003

The tighter he gripped my torso, the more I wish Liam would have finished the job and killed me.

I'm still a sobbing mess and by the time Jack carries me inside, I mentally break down. This isn't the first time this has happened and I can assure you it will not be the last.

I could care less about detention right now. The only thought running through my head is what I will tell my brother when he asks what happened.

How am I supposed to get through freshmen year, worrying about things like this happening?

Jack leads me towards the couch and I try to regather myslef as I trace the design on my mothers- if you could actually call her a mother- decorative pilliows.

Jack grabs an icepack out of the freezer and sits down next to me on the cold leather couch.

"Now tell me what happe-" he is cut off by my mother stumbling through the living room, obviously drunk.

"What are you doing here? School isn't over until 2:30!" She slurs and fumbles around with her words.

"We got off early today," I lie.

Jack and my mother have a bad history. A long, bad history. After dad left, Jack rebelled aganist everyone; even me. His father, a man I will never know, was all he had besides for our drunken mother. I'd like to think that he didn't leave because of me; Maybe he left because of mothers drinking problem.

Jack blamed my mother for our father, Michael leaving. He wanted to move out but mom was completely against the idea. Jack and I just started to become closer and closer sometime last year; he always talks about how he is leaving as soon as he turns 18 to persue his dreams of becoming a photographer.

I wish I coulod be happy for him because this is what he has wanted rto do for years, but once he does, its just me and mother. I will not be able to cope with all this.

"What happened to your face?" She asks as if she actually cares.

"I fell." An obvious lie but my mother doesn't seem to care.

"Whatever," she slurs and pours the remaining amount of red wine into her large wine glass. I stare as the dark red liquid fills the glass and she purses her lips to take a sip and I look away as the sour liquid fills her mouth.

Jack glares at me and then back at mom and storms up to his room. I wonder if he actually bought my excuse? It wasn't the best but it was all I could think of at the moment. e remaining amount of 

Dead.

Liam's voice rings through my head for the millionth time today. I would tell my brother if I knew that he would actually believe me but after what happened last time, I'm never even going to let the thought cross my mind again.

*flashback*

"Tessa, please tell me what happened!" Jack begged as tears fell from his eyes.

"It... was Liam," I breathed. It felt good to finally get it off my chest after years of torment from him.

"Liam McAllister?" He asked.

I don't trust my voice at the moment so I just nod my head. My brother is much bigger than Liam so I know that if he ever found out about what Liam did and continues to do to me he wouldn't hold back.

"That's not true!" He steps back.

Despite all the things that Liam has done, I know that him and my brother are really close friends.

"Yes it i-" I try to explain but he cuts me off.

"No, don't try to sit there and tell me that my best friend did this to you because I know that's a lie!" He yells and I am stunned and slightly scared by his actions when I am in such a state that I can nearly lift my arms and legs.

"But Jack-"

"No, you know what? I'm leaving! Fix this problem yourself!"

After that, I spent several hours sobbing into my pilliow and trying to call Jack. He never answered.

*flash back over*

It took me a long time to recover from his hurtful words and the fact that he would trust one of his friends rather than his own sister. Looking back, I'm still saddened at the thought.

By this time, my mother is no where to be found and my brother is probally upstairs in his room plotting different ways to attempt murder against our mother.

I start to think about what life might have been like if I wasn't even born. My mother would more than likely
recovered from her drinking problem and my dad would still be here. My brother would be happy and get along with my mother. But that didn't happen. I was born and tore the whole family apart.

My mother was unable to pay for our beautiful house and we were forced to live in a local hotel for three weeks until we found an apartment building not far from Ridgeway Highschool.

After I sit there thinking about what could have been a perfect life, I drift off to sleep.