⚠️TW// SELF HARM/Suicide⚠️
A/n: TO ANYONE WHO HAS EVER STRUGGLED WITH DEPRESSION AND SUICIDAL THOUGHTS..... JUST KNOW YOU ARE NOT ALONE. PLEASE IF ANYONE OF YOU EVER NEED ANYONE TO TALK TO IM HERE TO HELP YOU AND TO LISTEN NOT TO JUDGE..
MY INSTAGRAM IS @madds.carson88
Dm me if you need anything !!❤️
#suicideprevention
•ARIELLA•
The past month has been awful for me.... My parents are dead...... and my best friend was taken by death eaters. About two weeks after my parents death we decided where to Barry them........ it was my mums ' safe place'. There graves are next to eachother under a hudge willow tree about 8 miles away from hogsmead.
Fred and everyone had been nothing but helpful these past weeks..... he's actually never left my side. He helped me when I would have nightmares or when I break down out of nowhere. Sense the burrow burnt down, we currently reside at Grimmauld Place. Or So they call it. It's a black family house. The only thing was we weren't Allowed to leave...... Not that I wanted to... but it would be nice to get out.
As I walk down the stairs of the huge house, I hear chatter coming from downstairs when I walk down I see Molly scolding Ron for starting to eat before everyone else. I smile abit. " Ella dear, Goodmorning! How are you feeling today?" Molly asked in a genuine concerned way. " I'm doing okay" I said with a fake smile. Lies. I wasn't okay but I don't want to burden anyone with my problems.
" well I'm very happy your doing better Ella." Molly said smiling. I sat at the table, my mind starting to drift off. " Ella....... Love?............ ELLA!" Fred yelled grabbing my attention. " hm" I hummed looking at him. " are you alright" Fred asked. " yea........ I just drifted off." I said laughing abit. When everyone got down we all started eating.
That's another thing...... I don't even want to eat. But I force myself and with that Ive gotten back into my old habits..... it's honestly been awhile since I've made myself throw up... but it's starting to become consistent again.
" may I be excused?" I ask Molly. " yes dear" she said. As I got up jazz grabbed my arm.
" hey are you okay?" She asked which caused everyone to look up at me. " yes I'm fine.... Don't worry" I said smiling and nodding my head. She looked at me not convinced then let go.
When I got upstairs I went straight to the bathroom. I went to make myself throw up but I couldn't......... I looked at myself in the mirror.... It's all my fault.... My parents are dead because of me..... I didn't even know my dad very long.... Fred's childhood home..... no longer standing because of me... I finally broke.
Your so stupid.
Why are you even here?
Fred and everyone probably hates you.
I should've been the one to die that night.....
I've now reached the point of feeling empty. Like nothing mattered anymore. I immediately
Silenced the bathroom so no one could hear my sobs and screams. After 10 minutes of sobbing uncontrollably I realized I had mascara stains running down my face. I started rummaging threw the drawer...... as I was looking I seen a pack of razor blades..... then I got to thinking....
Would anyone miss me?
•FRED•
The moment Ella asked to be excused I knew something was up. Everyone did. She try's to act fine. Okay even. But I can see the pain in her eyes. Everyone's worried about her especially jazz. For the past month I've held Ella every night. Sometimes she would have nightmares and wake up screaming for it to stop.......
" I feel so terribly sorry for Ella" my mum said with a sad expression on her face. " I couldn't even imagine how's she's feeling. Losing everything she's ever known... all on Christmas." Theo said. " I'm gonna go check on her." Jazz said while getting up. We all nodded as she walked up the stairs.
Ella's not the only one grieving right now. George has been totally heartbroken scenes Sam was taken. I know it's not the same as her dying like Ella's parents but with her being with death eaters...... anything's possible..
Just then we all Hurd yelling from upstairs.
" HELP!!! SOMEBODY HELP!!!" Jazz screamed. Everyone instantly bolted upstairs. When I reached upstairs I turned to where I heard jazzes cryies from. " PLEASE ELLA DONT GO!! Ple-please!!" Jazz screamed. I was horrified by what I saw......
Blood everywhere..... cuts.... Deep cuts all over Ella's arms.. this can't be happening. Ella laying there Pale... I just stood there in shock.
" Oh my .... Ella!" My mum cryied hurrying to help her. Everyone stood in the hallway shocked. Hermione held back by Ron. She was sobbing along with the guys. " this can't be happening...." I mumbled still in shock. Tears burning in my eyes.
That's when I dropped to my knees..... " Fred!" George yelled. Him and the guys rushed over to me to help me back up. " sh-she can't- no no!" I cried. " we have to take her to St. Mungo's!" My mum yelled.
Everything that happened next happened so fast...... we all aparated to the hospital, waiting to see it Ella would be okay. We all waited In the waiting room. Draco held jazz while she cryied. George, Blaise and Theo all sat with me.
I can't believe she did this I knew she was hurting but not this bad...... I wish she would've told me.....
YOU ARE READING
As it was |FRED WEASLEY|
Fanfiction(COMPLETED STORY) FIRST BOOK IN THE EVERLASTING LOVE SERIES ⚠️MATURE CONTENT 18+⚠️ She was his...he was hers up until she wasn't... " what do you think dyings like?" She questioned softly while continuing to look up at the stars. " I have no idea...
