Lifesaver | Nick & Charlie

Finally Leaving

Charlie Spring

Reaching Mr. Ajayi's room, I waited outside for a second. There were tears streaming down my face now, and I didn't want him to know about it. Only, the tears kept coming, and I didn't want to be standing in the hallway crying in view.

"Charlie!" Mr. Ajayi excitedly called out once I walked through the door. His face dropped after properly taking in my appearance, though. "Charlie?" he cautiously asked, walking over straight away and hugging me.

It took a few more seconds of heavy breathing and uncontrollable sobs until I calmed down and the tears stopped coming. He motioned to a chair, so I sat down, knee bouncing up and down as I tried to fight off the overwhelming doom and embarrassment.

"What's going on, Charlie?"

I didn't know how to answer that question. I couldn't tell him about Ben for countless reasons, and I didn't want to discuss the problems with Tao because it hurt too much.

"Nothing," I eventually forced out, earning a disbelieving sigh in response. Mr. Ajayi had always been able to read me, so lying to him was just pointless.

"Right. You walked into my classroom crying because of nothing." His voice softened, "You know you can talk to me."

There was that simple sentence I'd heard too many times. 'You know you can talk to me.' But it was never true. No one would understand, and people would only become worried about me. Talking to people, no matter how much they swore I could, would only create more problems.

"You have to tell someone," he continued after the silence continued for too long. "It doesn't have to be me, but you need to talk to someone about all of this."

If only it were that simple, but who was I supposed to talk to? Tori would become too overbearing and worried. Tao hated me right now; and Isaac would likely take his side because it was always easier to side with Tao. My parents wouldn't care, or they'd tell me the same rehearsed story about how things would get better - magically, apparently - like they had when the bullying had started last year.

"I just don't know what to do," I confessed, despite my better judgment.

"Are you being bullied again?" The worry in his voice didn't help my own hesitation about confiding in someone. Either way, I shook my head no. "Well, I won't know how to help unless you tell me."

Why did I come here in the first place?

I mean, I loved Mr. Ajayi, but I wasn't planning on telling him anything. I just wanted to... to disappear? To drop off the side of the universe and have all this drama gone... wait, maybe I could. I should just leave everything and everyone - it's not like anyone would truly care (maybe for a week, but that's it).

"Don't worry," I sighed, chest buzzing with electricity. "I'm going to go." I stood up, already going through the motions of my plan. I didn't know where I would go, but anywhere was better than here. I should've gotten a fresh start somewhere else ages ago, and maybe if I did now...

"Wait, Charlie," he paused me when I reached the door. "I have a free period after lunch break. You can stay in the classroom and take some time to yourself. I can explain your absence to your teacher, and you can stay here alone."

I appreciated it, sending him a pleading smile. Without another word, he nodded his head, and collected his stuff before exiting the classroom.

Walking over to the corner of the room, I took a seat on the ground, pulling my phone from my pocket to look up trains departing from the station this afternoon.