Forty-Five: Jump On In

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"COLLINS?"

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"COLLINS?"

I wished Beau would stop saying my name like that. Like he was concerned and sweet and caring. It didn't make any of this easier.

"What?"

My number one tactic in life was to pretend everything was fine when in reality it was a disaster, so I stared myself in the mirror and tried to get my face in order. The one I needed to put on.

There was a pause on Beau's end. And then finally...

"Can you open the door?"

I shook my head, even though he couldn't see me. No, no I could not open the door. I wasn't put together yet. Probably wouldn't be for a long time.

"Collins," Beau groaned after a few quiet moments.

Goddamnit. He wasn't going to leave, was he?



"Here it is."

I handed Beau my neatly wrapped present, and he sat with it on my bed. His giddiness had returned, that Christmas morning gleam in his eye that made me cross my fingers in hopes that he liked what I'd made.

"You really got me a gift," he said with a hushed sort of wonder.

"Did you think I was lying?" I laughed.

"Well, no," he said with a shrug. "But...why?"

Why? He dared to ask me that after he presented me with a brand-spanking-new car this morning?

"What do you mean why?" Walking across the room, I dropped onto the bed beside him—but not before leaving a kiss on his cheek. "It's our one-month anniversary."

"But—" Beau dropped his gaze to the package again, eying it.

"You thought you were the only one counting, didn't you?"

He winced. "Kinda, yeah."

I sighed. "Beau, every day being your girlfriend makes me happier than the last. I'm never going to forget the day you kissed me in front of everyone and made me yours."

He stared at me like he was memorizing my face. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." I swallowed. "Now open your present. It's not much—"

"Oh, shush." With that, Beau began ripping open the wrapping paper with the excitement of a little kid on his birthday. "Mugs!"

I couldn't help but laugh. No one should be that enthusiastic about mugs, but Beau was twirling each one around to catch every angle of the black ceramic cups.

"Yeah, well, you never did get to finish your mug for your bomb ass hot cocoa, so I thought I'd make it for you. And then one mug turned into a set of mugs."

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