Self Love

Chapter 5

I took a deep breath as a way to brace myself for the worst.

"Riley leave us." I told her and shut the door afterwards.

Why would this man be here of all places? Now when I'm finally at a better place in my life after all the damage he inflicted.

"Malcolm what do you want?" I asked. Deep breathes, deep breathes, deep breathes. I was not going to give him the pleasure of watching me have a panic attack.

"To talk , I swear. Then I'll leave."

The sooner he goes the better.

"Start talking."

"I'm sorry. I was in a dark place. I wanted a sense of control in my life. I felt like I didn't have any. I felt powerless. I thought by abusing you I had that. I thought I had power by controlling you but I didn't. I need you. I want you back in my life. Take me back. I know you want to. You miss me just as much as I miss you. Skye say yes."

The worst part of it all is that there is a small part of me that wants to. A small part of me that's naive enough to believe him. He did things that give me nightmares and panic attacks just by the thought of them. I have to keep my mind busy to not think about them. Exhaust my mind to not dream of them at night. I know he hasn't changed but the teenage girl in me who wants it all to have been fake and made up and imaginary is considering taking him back but, I won't. I deserve better. I deserve respect. I deserve to look at myself in the mirror and not get haunted by my bruises.

"Get out." I calmly say. Hurting him will not heal my pain. I have to repeat that over and over as I am tempted to throw the flower vase on my shelf on his head. He violated me when I was 14 to 15 disappeared and came back when I was 17 and 19. He asked for my forgiveness and I blindly took him back for him to hurt me again. He goes and comes back. I take him back, he hurts me. I had enough 3 years ago and I'm surely not taking him back.

"Skye-"

"Leave or I scream." I say calmly.

He starts approaching me or the door I don't know but what I do know is I'm about to have a panic attack. I start hyperventilating and moving away from him as my heart rate picks up. I stumbled on the bin and tripped.

" I can't breathe. I can't breathe. I can't breathe."

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Jake's POV

I'm currently with Lamar going to my sister's office. We need to talk numbers and I have my plate full for the day so she'll have to take over. I may not like his interest in her but he does present a good business deal. He's even connected us to his sister's media start up company. I have to remember my sister is an adult but after the Malcolm bullshit I have my guard way up.

"Riley is she in? Skye I mean."

"Yes but she's with someone, a Mr. Malcolm Ravens and asked to be left alone." But I didn't catch anything afterwards.

"Malcolm? You're sure?" I asked controlling my anger because I was seeing red.

She nodded, "Yes sir." After everything he's done, she let him stay? "Call security. Now."

I rush to her office and my anger skyrockets when I hear a thud. I barge in and what I see makes me lose it. I hit him while Lamar helps Skye.

"I didn't do anything. I swear." He defends.

"I can't breathe...." She's having a panic attack.

"Leave and don't come back. Ever again." Security apprehends him while I go to her. I hear Lamar shouting for someone to call 911.

"Hey, it's Jake. He's gone. It's just Jake and Lamar. Breathe Skye." I say over and over. She's crying. If he touched her again he's dead. She's holding onto my arm tightly. Her nails are digging into my skin but I won't let go. She needs this. Moments later she passes out. I hold onto her. Alex comes rushing in.

"I heard chatter when leaving the conference room. What happened?" He asked worriedly.

"Malcolm showed up-"

"Where is he?" Alex asked.

"Security."

"They're on their way." Lamar just got off the phone with the paramedics.

"Alex, she'll be fine." I have to calm him down. Growing up I may have been the most protective of my siblings but Alex and Skye were closer to one another. I was 4 years older than Alex and 5 years older than Skye. They were a year apart. Closer by age I guess made them relate easier to one another. Besides to Skye I was like the 3rd easiest to talk to parent. She came to me first about moving out. I helped her pick out a few places. That made me feel like no matter what we were still close in our own way and that I mattered.

When the medics arrived Lamar had to ask me to let her go so that they could help her.

"I'll have you discuss the details with Leo, he's the 2nd in the department." I sighed.

"Hey it's going to be okay." Lamar assured me. My mind is just all over the place. I just can't believe he got to her here. Malcolm never got near her in a setting near the family.

Alex is on the phone with our family informing them what happened. My best guess is they'll meet us at the hospital.

"I want a restraining order on him, Alex."

"I want him dead Jake."

"Go with her Alex. I'll join you later. As selfish as it may seem, I am also needed here."

"It's okay."

I took care of all my meetings, postponed the least important ones. I informed security that Malcolm is banned from the company. Even if my sister caves and allows his presence it is to go through me.

When I was done, I left for the hospital. I just hope she's okay.

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Fifth chapter down.

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