In Between Love and Tragedy (Phan)

My Stupid Little Crush

*Dan's POV*

I began to get ready for yet another reached day of school. Putting on mostly black since that is my signature clothing and I didn't own any brightly colored clothes at all. I strained my unbearable curly hair and was just about ready to leave. I exited my apartment complex on to the iced over side walk.

The cold aired seeped into my clothing making me shiver in chills as I could hear the crunch of the fallen snow under my feet. Continuing to walk like I always do I made my way I felt a sudden arm around mine. Turing to find my friend Nick. "Hey buddy how are you?"

"I'm freezing that's how I am, why the fuck does it always have to be so cold."

"Cause it's winter dumb ass, that's how it's supposed to be." Nick replied with a laugh.

Nick and I have been friends since I started highschool. He was the only one among countless kids trying to fit in by being something they're not and bonehead jocks that actually understand me. I always saw him as a great friend rather than anything else.

But suddenly I saw him differently, as if he was the only person in this infinite universe that could make me laugh as we joked around. Unlike me though he embraced his curly locks. While I'm still insecure about my natural hair.

We entered the school as people filed in. Walking to my first period history class. I honestly hated it the most because of how long and dreadful it is. All I need to know about history are just the main key points, not my dick head teacher ranting his opinions towards us.

It was just plain awful. Despite being here for two years I still rarely know that many people. Due to being the quite shy kid in the back. I try not to voice my opinions because that always leads to trouble because every doesn't like to be told that someone thinks something else.

They're are all so thick skulked towards everything they don't know how to deal with it. I'm just so glad I only have to spend 7hours here. By the time I went to my next class everything just kind of flew by in a blur. I rarely remember anything that goes on anyway. All I hear is blah blah blah and not enough actual life improving knowledge.

Already it was time for lunch. Like always I would have sat outside by the tree where I could be alone and collect my thoughts on how everyone around are completely ignorant towards everything. Worrying about who should I sleep with next rather than what is my purpose as a tiny speck in the universe. But instead due to the weather I have to sit in the cafeteria full of irrelevant people.

As I sat down unraveling my packed lunch on the table. Nick sat down next to me. "What do you have today?" I asked taking out a basic as fuck peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I really should change that. And plain chips. My food is too bland to bare. Maybe it's just a representation of how I'm bland. Shit another unintentional deep thought.

"Turkey and cheese with chips. What about you?"

"My bland everyday lunch. I'm turning into a basic bitch. Help." I said pouting.

"You're not a basic bitch that requires you to be dull. And the last time I checked you are one of the people at this school that actually has a personality. Anyway speaking of basic bitches I heard Jessica is having a party on Friday."

"And?" I said biting into my sandwich.

"We should go-"

"No no no!" I interrupted Nick mid sentence.

"What?"

"I don't want to be surrounded by countless sluts, stoners, or any of that getting hammered shit."

"Come on its almost the end of the year and plus it beats staying inside always, just think about it. Plus I don't want to be the only sober one there I need someone's help to take photos of the aftermath."

"Fine." I replied biting aggressively into my sandwich. I put it down as just observed the human species that I was apart of. Except I wasn't in any cliques cause that requires you have to actually be social. I kinda just zoned out staring into the distance.

"Hey you have something on your lip." Nick said gesturing towards the right side. Being the idiot I was though I didn't get it. "Here?"

"No just let me do it." Nick said leaning towards me picking off a glob of jelly eating it after. Causing me to blush due to the physical and eye contact. Damn you 'irl' anime moments.

The thing is I don't know how to feel about Nick, since I might actually have a small crush on him. Yes I did identify myself as a homosexual. But I rarely tell anyone since I feel as if it doesn't matter what gender I prefer to date whether it's male or female. It doesn't change you personality but it causes major controversies. So I just choose to leave it out.

Soon after I finished eating and chatting with Nick lunch was already over. I had art and music then I finally had my freedom. Instead of being restrained in this school I could finally go to my flat and just watch anime since it's the main reason I sometimes procrastinate besides the fact that Tumblr is a whole that sucks you in with its endless scrolling abilities.

I had a somewhat small friend group it was just me, Nick, Charlie, Louise, Pj, and Luke. We all talked about different things and had different perspectives on things which also made my friendships with them more excited and worth something.

Pretty much soon after I tuned out the teachers for the next two hours it was time for me to get home. I walked with Nick home and dropped him off at his place. Continuing to walk along the road by myself.

Whenever I do I feel as if it's the most dangerous thing because that's when I start to talk to myself. Don't get me wrong I'm perfectly sane. Or at least I think but always imagine future conversations I could be having with someone the accidentally slip up and speak out loud.

Thank god no one is on the street that much and the fact I live alone. By the time I got home I was already to tired to do any work, and basically decide to procrastinate like the motherfucker I am.

//an\\
So if any of you are confused so far the beginning of this starts with the ship dick which will sail then sink leaving the s.s phan to come into place because phil and dan don't know each other yet so just hold on for now. Hope you liked the chapter.