May 12,1993
Dear John,
I'm pregnant. I'm pregnant, and you're the only person I've told. I'm having a blood test done, but I'm almost certain the baby is yours. I won't tell anyone until I know for sure, but I wanted you to know. My world is collapsing around me without you. My world would probably collapse even if you were here. The only difference would be, that I would have you to hold me up while everything else crashed to the ground. Roman works constantly, and now he's talking to the ISA again. He barely communicates with me, and when he does it's generally to find fault with something I've done. We're both unhappy in this marriage, and now I'm pregnant. I'm either having my husband's baby, and bringing it into a marriage on the brink of divorce...or I'm having your baby...which would destroy my marriage anyway.
This baby, if I'm being honest...I want it to be your baby, even knowing what will happen. My marriage to Roman has been on my mind since you left. The last three months without you have been awful. I'm unhappy, miserable, and depressed. I don't love my husband, at least, not the way that I should love him, and what am I teaching my children, John? Am I teaching them that when you're married, and you're miserable, you stay anyway because you made a vow? Does that even apply in this case? Because my last vow to love someone until my last breath, well, that vow was made to you.
I love you,
Marlena
YOU ARE READING
Dear John
FanfictionA series of letters written to John in 1993 by various people in his life, begging him to come back to Salem.
