... ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇʏ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʀᴏᴏᴍᴍᴀᴛᴇꜱ | ɴᴀ ᴊᴀᴇᴍɪɴ

| f o u r t e e n |

you knew he was coming. from all the shouting that had happened you guessed he had learned that you had been telling the truth from the beginning. all of this could've been avoided if that son of a bitch had just chosen to believe you instead of a random chick who wanted nothing more but- you shook your head. you shouldn't let your mind wander too much or else you'd get a headache.

even though you expected him, something inside of you still turned burning hot when he actually walked through the door to your room. jaemin felt rather relieved that you weren't crying anymore, but the aftermath of crying was still very clear on your face. red and puffy eyes, a red nose and sniffing still.

"what do you want?" you asked him, trying to sound as normal as possible with your nose still full of snot from the crying you had done earlier. you knew what he wanted, he wanted to talk. he wanted to talk and maybe try to fix the friendship or whatever that had actually started appearing between the two of you before shit went down. he widened his eyes a bit, slightly taken aback by your question for some reason. jaemin cleared his throat, his eyes shifting downwards, "why didn't you tell me before?"

"had you believed me?" your answer left you faster than anticipated, and you watched as he shifted his weight from side to side, his head not lifting.

"well, i-"

you cut him off, "the answer to that is no, so just go back to your little study partner who clearly just wants to get in your fucking pants and leave me alone." the words that left you were ones that came out in anger. jieun had left already, you had heard the bang of the door getting slammed shut. however, at the same time it felt extremely good to say. for a second as you saw his eyes widen again, his head finally lifted, you actually thought that things could get better - the two of you had a chance of fixing it all.

then the motherfucker spoke again.

"why are you so mad?" maybe it wasn't a question that was supposed to make you agitated, maybe he was genuinely curious and trying to understand. in that moment you doubted that it was the latter, because he should know better. you had already told him everything about what she had said to you, she had even confessed to some of it herself or else you wouldn't be in the situation you were in. so why? why didn't he see why you were mad?

"because she's a bitch." you answered. jaemin shook his head, and you were milliseconds away from making sure he never had kids, but then he took a step towards you, his hand reaching out to grab your wrist before he pulled your weight up from your bed you previously had sat on. there was a look in his eyes you couldn't quite pinpoint and you could only stare at him as he spoke up, "so it really isn't because you feel anything towards me?"

what.

you stared at him for a few seconds, not moving a single muscle. you repeated the words in your head, trying to make sense of the situation, but it seemed the more you repeated those goddamn words, the more lost you got. wiggling out of his grip, you shook your head, the action making the male's stomach drop, "na jaemin, what the fuck?"

he swallowed, his lips pressing together. it was too late to back out now, he couldn't just take back what he had just said. jaemin reached out to grab your wrist yet again, his grip tighter this time, and he spoke up again, "you don't feel the same i feel towards you? you don't want me as much as i want you?"

if you had to be honest you weren't sure if he was fucking with you, which was the biggest reason for your hesitancy. he wanted you, he had said, but since when? and in what way? had what jieun said been true? maybe he actually just wanted to get an easy fuck out of you or maybe he was just saying things in the heat of the moment.

with a sigh you placed a hand on his chest, pushing him away from you slightly, "jaemin.. i think you should take a cold shower or something."

jaemin looked at you, his shoulders slumped. he then asked you, "do you really hate me that much?"

you shook your head at his question, rubbing your eyes as the argument began to take its toll on you. it was exhausting to argue. taking a deep breath, you verbally answered his question, "jaemin, no.. you drive me up the fucking wall and you make me want to punch you every time i see you, but no, i don't hate you."

you stared at him, waiting for him to say something, but nothing came, he wasn't even looking at you anymore. jaemin finally laughed lowly, and for a second time today, you thought it was over, thought that things were gonna be better again. in a way it annoyed you that he was laughing because what was amusing about any of this? and then at the same time it was relieving.

but he spoke up again, and he did so while rubbing his face, "why are girls this fucking confusing?"

maybe it wasn't completely over yet..

his voice sounded strained, and he looked up, his eyes closing. jaemin shook his head, a smile that was clearly fake adorning his face. instead of the more soft voice he had used when asking the previous question, his voice turned more harsh and hard as he asked you the next question, "can you just fucking tell me if you're in love with me like i'm in love with you or not?"

the hairs on your arms stood up, and you hoped the floor swallowed you as his intense eyes stared you. did you love him? you weren't sure, you had started falling for him, sure. but love was such a strong and scary word. that was your answer, you didn't know, you sincerely didn't know. and that was what you told him, trying to keep yourself from stuttering too much throughout the short answer.

"i-i don't know."

jaemin shook his head, words hurriedly leaving his mouth, "of course you don't, because girls can never make up their mind, huh?"

it was the second time a door was slammed shut in your apartment that day, but this time it was your door and not the front. it took you just a few seconds to realize that jaemin had stormed off to what presumably was his own room.

you didn't run after him or anything  because you weren't sure what to say or how to act if you confronted him right now. hell, you didn't even know what to think. maybe you needed a cold shower as well.