HeartBound {Avengers Fanfic}

Chapter 14: Letting Go

"Moving on, is a simple thing, what it leaves behind is hard."

–Dave Mustaine

Natasha glared at Freyja suspiciously, "What are you doing here?"

Perhaps, Freyja thought suddenly, my question can wait.

"A pleasure to see you as well, Natasha," she sighed, intent on being polite regardless of the spy's tone. "Now, if you would be so kind as to excuse me-"

She tried to circle around the agent, but Natasha simply moved to block her.

"What are you doing here?" she repeated.

Well, if Natasha was going to push her...

"I am honestly beginning to lose my patience with you humans believing you can force me to answer your questions. I do not have to answer you and, quite frankly, I do not have to do anything you ask."

"We wouldn't ask so many questions if you were more open."

"Long ago, I learned three can keep a secret if two are dead. Need I remind you of the time you learned that very same lesson, daughter of Drakov?"

Natasha's eyes flared in anger as she snapped, "Stay out of my mind!"

"There is your mistake," Freyja said. "I am not looking into your mind. Do not blame me if you broadcast your past and thoughts into your aura. It is not as though I can ignore what is right before my eyes."

"You're not the only one who can read people," Natasha told her. "What is it that you want to ask so desperately?"

Freyja shrugged, "It can wait until your mood has lightened. As it is, I doubt you will enjoy the query."

"Spit it out, I don't have time to waste."

If Natasha wanted it so desperately, she would give her the question, "How do you live with yourself?"

"Excuse me?!"

Freyja shook her head, cursing herself for not taking into account the fact that the all-tongue spell only translated loosely, causing some of her sentences to seem harsher than she intended. She gave a sigh and tried to think of a better alternative.

"Allow me to rephrase that - your dialect and meaning is different than mine and my words often come out wrong," she explained. "You have the blood of many on your hands, far more death in your past than anyone should have to live with, and believe me when I say that I understand. You try to hide the guilt, but it is plain in your aura. My question to you is how do you overcome the guilt?"

"That's none of your business," she snarled.

"I simply request your advice on the topic."

"What do you have to regret?"

"What have I to regret?" she asked incredulously, laughing humorlessly. "You are not the only one to have...blood on your hands."

"You killed someone? According to Fury and Thor, you haven't killed so much as a mosquito. If you have anything to regret, it's your attachment to that monster you can't let go."

Freyja felt as if she had been punched in the stomach. Of course Thor wouldn't bring up Merek, as he had never thought of her actions as anything more than self-defense, but he didn't know about how many deaths she had caused indirectly. Thanos had murdered them, but it was Freyja who had practically handpicked the victims. But Natasha pointing out Loki and what he had done under Thanos's control? It was a cheap trick, a low blow, to bring up Loki. Before Freyja could retort, Natasha continued.