LiL PEEP X Reader

the dream world

☆

After a long and tiring day, you finally make it home. You're drained and still need to make it to your room with your hands full of what you'd picked up while you were out. Struggling, you make it to your bedroom door, and using your elbow, you swing it open. You make your way towards your bed and let the items fall from your arms and you fall on the bed beside them. You're exhausted. Drama, people, and situations. It seems life can't catch you a break. You've got a lot on your shoulders lately and you need a night to escape from it all. So much so, that a sober you had decided to hit up an old friend to have her roll you a couple of joints.

After a couple of minutes of resting, you stretch out your arms.
"Why can't I ever catch a break?" You sigh.

Pulling yourself up, you look at the assortment of items you had laid next to you. A bottle of water, a couple of joints in a cylinder jar, some cash, your phone, and your over-the-ear beats headphones. You reach for the jar and open it. You haven't smoked in such a long time and your history with drugs in the past was that of an addict. The idea of smoking made you anxious but you really wanted a way to mellow out and get your mind off things. Trying not to think about it too much, you pick up one of the joints from out of the jar and close it tightly shut.

Where's the lighter I picked up when I was traveling? I think it may be in my purse?
You stand up and head over to your desk. You had a nice setup. Two monitors, an LED keyboard, a drawing tablet, a mini piano, a fancy stand-up mic, and a fairly good PC that glowed colours from the front. You had picked up your old hobby of gaming again once you got sober a few years back. You even were starting to make music again. Gazing at your setup, you spot the purse beside the PC and begin to dig through it, trying to find the — Nice.

You feel the lighter in the bag, pick it up and take a deep breath. In and out. A bit nervous to smoke after it had been so long, you head over to your window and slide it open. You bring the joint to your face and press the joint between your lips. You spark your light.

You take small, shallow puffs at first and put it out only after about 3 or 4 hits. Your goal really wasn't to get high, more that you just wanted to mellow out your mind from problems. Your tolerance was below nothing and an anxiety attack was the last thing you wanted to risk.

A few minutes later, you turn on your TV and choose the album "Currents" by Tame Impala to listen to. By this point, you can start to feel heavier and more numb. It's a pleasant feeling but as a bit of time passes, you begin to feel a tad anxious.
Fuck man.

Flashbacks from old trauma flood into your head from your old addict days. You try to fight the mentality, reassuring yourself in your head as much as you can that you're alright and reminding yourself that this is just the anxiety. Your hands get a little shaky and it isn't quite working. You feel your chest getting tighter and before the feeling gets worse, you head over to the exit of your bedroom and into your washroom across the hall. This will pass and you're not reliving your past. Calm down (y/n).

You throw off your clothes, toss them to the side and turn on the water to your shower. You let cold water flow and step in. Ack! The water is freezing and sends a shock through your chest.
God damn it, why was the old me so stupid?

About a half an hour goes by, ice-cold water running over your body and the peak of the high slowly begins to settle so you take that as your cue that you can step out now. You get out of the shower, take your dirty clothes back to your room, and put them in your laundry basket.

I could calm down some more if I went on a walk, huh? Walks always calm me down.
You go through your drawers looking for something to wear and find some black lululemon leggings, a big baggy sweater, and a beanie. You put the clothes on and adjust the beanie over your wet hair. You then throw the hood of your sweater over the beanie and catch a glimpse of yourself in your bedroom mirror. Good enough.