SYNOPSIS: Crowley realizes that going to Dean was a mistake when he remembers that the Winchesters famously have authority issues. Demon Dean remembers he looks good in a crown. Sam thinks of a way to keep Dean off the throne of Hell- But it comes at a heavy price.
(inspired by 'thewinchestercave' on tumblr)
TW:
SHIPS: none
--
"Listen, Squirrel, I need your help," Crowley broke the silence.
Dean looked up from his beer, "Oh, yeah?"
"You're powerful. You can help me get my kingdom where it needs to be. Whip Hell into shape."
Dean smiled, "Really, Crowley? Because I can think of so many better things that are much more worth my time."
"And what are those?" Crowley sipped his drink, "Drinking and karaoke for the rest of eternity?"
"Oh, no. See, pal, I'm a Knight of Hell. And you're a salesperson. You're in over your head, Crowley. So I should think-" Dean's eyes turned black, "That you've got a throne to relinquish, buddy."
Crowley blinked in shock, "What?"
"Tonight. We go to Hell. You issue a proclamation or whatever saying you're abdicating the throne. That way I don't have to bother to kill you."
Crowley set his jaw, "You wouldn't."
"Hell yeah, I would."
Crowley glared at him, but saw that he meant it. Dean wanted the Crown. Or, more accurately, the part that wasn't Dean wanted the crown, the part that was a demon, a Knight of Hell. How could Crowley stop a Knight of Hell? He couldn't get Dean to do anything even when Dean had been human... But Sam could. Would he be able to now that Dean was a demon?
It was worth a try.
Crowley snapped his fingers and teleported to somewhere with less angry Knights and more little brothers of angry Knights.
--
"Sam, I need your help."
Sam jumped slightly, and whirled around to face whoever had spoken, "Wha- Crowley," His expression hardened, "I swear to all things holy, and a couple of things that aren't, I am going to-!"
"Enough with the threats, Moose, we have bigger problems."
"Which you need my help to deal with?"
"Yes. It's about your brother."
"Oh, the one you turned into a demon?!"
"He would've been a demon even if I wasn't there! Water under the bridge! That's not the point! He's going to overthrow me!"
"What?!"
"Your brother is trying to take my throne!" Crowley hissed.
"I can't do anything to help you! I tried to talk to him, he won't listen! All I want to do is track him down and cure him, Crowley! And I certainly don't want to help you!"
"You can't cure him if he's king of Hell!" Crowley looked as if he realized something, "A Winchester as king of Hell! My kingdom would be ruined! And even at that, it's the wrong Winchester!"
"Excuse me?!" Sam frowned.
"You might've managed to not ruin anything, while under the influence at least, but he- he... Wait...," Crowley trailed off, a grin spreading on his face.
