Marvel One-Shots

A Privately Unprofessional Dilemma

Steve Rogers and Female Reader (slightly nsfw)

Breaking in your chest, your delicate heart shattered into a flurry of sharp shards and pierced your lungs, making the flow of oxygen impossible. Tears built up furiously in the waterline of your eyes, dancing on the edge and threatening to fall. Your mouth had snapped shut at the moment you saw them, the ability to speak immediately vanishing.

Bucky wrapped his hand around your shoulder, understanding the pain that had ruptured inside you and trying his best to dull the sadness. He looked down at you with pity swimming laps in his irises and slowly stepped in the view's way, blocking them from you.

Even with Bucky's broad chest guarding your vision, you couldn't help but picture the previous moment again in your head: the way Nat's hand gripped Carol's cheek and brought her closer, the way their lips locked together passionately and how Carol's hands explored Nat's body.

It broke you.

Your love for Nat refused to waver as you saw it happen, instead replaced with molten jealously that bubbled in the pits of your stomach, along with a type of burning despondency that tore through your soul. Her untold rejection struck you with such undiluted force that you couldn't handle it. Looking for comfort in Bucky by laying your fevered forehead over his heart.

Tenderly, your best friend wrapped his hands around your waist and ushered you into a corner of the room, shielding you from Nat and the rest of the partygoers- having a breakdown whilst at a college party was not your greatest moment. Bucky already knew all the emotions you were feeling right now were overwhelming you, and he refused to let embarrassment add to the mix.

He noticed the patio door to the right of him and walked you through it, allowing the night breeze to stroke its elegant fingers through your hair and to dehydrate the sweat on your face. Breathing it in deeply, you thanked Bucky for his patience with you and clasped his hand... as she had with Carol's.

Imagining it again only heated the envy more, roughly dissipating the bliss the wind had given you and making you weep again. You felt pathetic for allowing her to have so much control over your feelings, and the realisation that she had you wrapped around her finger made you sob with shame.

Striking his lighter, Bucky waved it in front of his mouth, and his cigarette glowed. He inhaled the smoke and pulled you closer again. Normally you hated his sick habit, constantly reprimanding him for smoking and telling him about all the negative side effects, but you didn't have the strength to object right now.

It appeared you lost consciousness after that. Your body moved in lethargic movements that were carefully supervised by Bucky. You remember thanking him again for helping you throughout the night and hugging him tightly as he tucked you into your bed. Bucky's caring nature radiated through your apartment and he couldn't help but look at you with despair as the tears continued to roll down your face, even in your sleep.

-----

Happiness evaded you for the next few weeks. It wasn't all because of Nat: you had exams coming up and the workload was immense, Bucky had started dating someone so you saw him less and finally, you were late on rent.

It turned out you were existing in a continuous loophole of school, studying and crying- you couldn't catch a break and your emotions were extremetile. You could never handle stress well, your only reacit were either screaming or crying (and you had already exhausted both of those options to their full extent).

As you pulled your jeans up your legs, you looked at your face in the mirror above your dressing table: dark circles painted under your eyes, dry lips filled with cracks and a smattering of painful spots over your chin. Some makeup would fix your dishevelled appearance and you applied it with haste, as you noticed the time- you had a class in 20 minutes and it took at least 15 to get to the campus.