Time Makes You Bolder (Sequel to No One's A Fool)

Chapter 16

It would be another three months before the tour started. In the time before, Stevie stayed in Phoenix, bonding with her baby. Stevie found she enjoyed motherhood even more than she had anticipated, often holding the baby, and staring at her as she slept. Every evening she took her on walks, and at night she rocked her to sleep. She didn't take this baby for granted, and she made sure to talk to her and hold her as often as she could. She found that all the worry and grief she had felt about Joe dissipated after Wrenna was born. She knew that in the years to come, she would have to explain things to her daughter. But for now, she was happy.

When it came time to prepare for the tour, she, Lori, Amy, and Wrenna made the trek back to Los Angeles. Amy stayed with Stevie in her house in LA, and no one made any mention of her moving back in with Mick.

That first night on tour, Stevie felt like she was coming home. Things were different now, as she nursed Wrenna while getting her makeup done. She made sure there was a bottle in the fridge in case the baby needed to eat before their set was done. She held Wrenna while she warmed up her voice, walking back and forth, rocking the baby in her arms. Then, as the tour manager knocked on the door to signal it was time, she handed the baby off to Amy.

"She'll be fine, Stevie. I promise." Amy assured her, and she nodded, kissing her daughter's head one more time before turning to leave.

Mick was waiting for her outside the dressing room. He smiled as she took a deep breath.

"She's going to be fine." He told her.

"I know. But am I?"

"You were born for this. All of it." Mick said and offered her his arm.

Two and a half hours later she sighed with relief. She was a mother, and she had just performed onstage again. She could do both. Back at the dressing room she found Amy stretched out on the couch reading, with Wrenna asleep on top of her.

"Oh, I wish I had a camera to take a photo of you two!" Stevie cooed, walking over to the couch and putting her hand on the baby's head. "How was she?"

"She was great! I played with her, and then she started getting fussy, so I rocked her, and she went right to sleep. She's been sleeping for a couple hours now."

"Did you sit there with her the whole time?" Stevie inquired. Amy nodded. "Oh Amy, you're an angel! Do you know that? I didn't worry about her for one second, because I knew I didn't need to." Amy beamed. "Let me change, and then I'll take her from you, okay?"

"Take your time." Amy shrugged and went back to her book. Stevie quickly swapped out her outfit for something to wear back to the hotel, and then came back to lift Wrenna into her arms. The baby continued to sleep for the ride back, but as Stevie was getting into her room, she awoke and began to fuss. Stevie knew she was hungry, and she hurried to set all her things down before settling on the bed to nurse the baby, whose crying quieted the moment she was latched. Stevie held her and talked to her, rubbing her head, as she often did when she nursed her daughter. But this time, Wrenna stared at her, and eventually, brought her hand up and placed it over Stevie's heart. Stevie's eyes filled with tears.

"My angel." She whispered. "Is this to say you don't mind being on the road with me? I was so worried about leaving you to be onstage every night. But I don't think I needed to worry about a thing." When they were done, she burped and changed the baby, but Wrenna began to fuss again. Stevie offered to nurse her again, thinking she might still be hungry, but the baby refused to latch. She didn't outright cry, but she made it known she wasn't content, until finally Stevie had the idea to strip her out of her clothes and hold her skin to skin. Instantly, the child was quiet and calm, and Stevie was filled with emotion. All along, Wrenna had only wanted to be connected to her.

On every tour prior to this one, Stevie would stay up late afterwards partying in hotels. She'd drink and snort cocaine and barely remember any of it the next day, when she slept late into the afternoon. Before she'd gotten pregnant, and the tour was being discussed, she worried about what it would be like to tour clean for the first time ever. But now, laying on her bed with Wrenna on her chest, she didn't even care if the others were down the hall boozing and smoking. Not a single part of her wanted to be anywhere else but right where she was.

Eventually Lori made her way into the room, followed shortly by Sharon, and then Amy, who had to ask her dad's permission and Stevie's before she was allowed by Mick to join the women. Christine wandered in at some point, and Mick stopped by as well. They all sat around, talking, a few of them drinking wine. They passed Wrenna around, but when the baby began to cry, she was given right back to Stevie, who nursed her again and rocked her back to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~

He saw her once when she was about a year old. They were all backstage at a charity event. The Eagles were performing, and Stevie was doing a small solo set as well. The place was packing with musicians, milling about, drinking in the halls, getting ready to be called up for their time onstage. He walked past a green room when he paused, hearing a little girl giggling.

"Mommy, look! Wrenna's trying to walk to me!" The voice said, He paused, looking at the small child, around four years old, holding her arms out. Several feet away was a baby, about a year old, blonde hair and fair-skinned. She was crawling, trying to stand up. And for a split second, she turned and looked right at Joe. She had his eyes, there was no doubt. The baby smiled and then turned her attention back to the little girl. It was at that moment that Lori Nicks walked into view of the doorway and recognized Joe. In an instant, she had scooped the baby up, shielding her from view, and stormed towards the door, slamming it shut in his face.

~~~~~~~

"So that was the first year." Stevie said, reaching for her glass of water. They had reconvened at the fire pit that night, Aurora asleep on Mick's lap, everyone toasting marshmallows and drinking wine. "I got pregnant in October of '86, and we were on tour together in October of '87. It was a truly defining year for me. Best year of my life."

"Best year of your life, but Lindsey almost killed you, and Joe was nowhere to be found." Wrenna frowned.

"It's true. It was stressful, that's for sure. But didn't you hear in all of that story how much love I was surrounded with? So many people came to support me. All our ladies who were there when you were born. The band, who – aside from Lindsey – was kind and accommodating about me having a baby. Our family, who was thrilled. And the first man who ever loved you." She pointed to Mick, smiling across to him, and he beamed.

"So you were there that first day. You were around a lot. But – you two really weren't together?" Gabe asked.

"No, not until Wrenna was about seven."

"So how did all of that happen? I don't think I ever really knew. I just remember you... being there. And then one day you were living with us." She asked. "I can't really remember a time when you weren't around a lot. So I don't think it was a big deal when you two started dating."

"It was gradual." Mick confirmed. "But after she returned from rehab was when I got honest about my feelings. That changed a lot of things between us."