Adoring Her, the Moon

Lassitude

Lassitude

(N. lass-ih-too-de) - a state of physical or mental weariness; lack of energy.

September 12th, 2002

"What are you doing?" Mrs. Zabini asks, i've learnt her name is- was Adelaine, and that she died four years ago when Blaise was 18. I would feel sorry for them, but I don't.

"Looking around," I reply, trying the desk drawers, locked.

"For?"

"Anything that might help get me out of here."

"Do you have a wand yet?"

"No."

"If you did, you could probably use alohomora again," I stand up and face her. She's smiling wickedly and fear suddenly runs through my gut.

"How do you know about that?" Has she told Zabini? Would she tell Zabini? She has mentioned that they don't visit often, meaning they don't usually talk.

"You learn a lot when you're stuck on a wall." She winks, "the door was also open and I could see you unlock Blaises door," she smirks and I sit on the chair. I anxiously bite at my fingers.

"Will you tell him? That I used magic," I whisper magic, though I'm not sure why.

"Gosh no, I would if he bothered to say a word to me. But he hasn't said anything to me since- since, I can't quite remember actually," Adelaine frowns and is swept into thought. She starts to count with her fingers and I return my attention to the desk. I rattle a few more cabinets around but end up giving up. I slump down in the chair and look up at the clock. Still three hours until Blaise comes home.

I leave Adaline to her counting and close the door behind me. I wander the hallway for a bit, and I purposely keep walking past Blaise's door. I pace around it. Circle it, slowly but surely closing the distance between us. Soon enough, I'm standing right in front of it. Slowly, I reach for the handle, looking over my shoulders while I do. My hand makes contact with the cool metal and I exhale. When I twist it, it's locked. Fine then, we'll do this the hard way. I do everything I did last time, I focus on the feeling of the metal, I focus on my hand, I focus on my intentions. Alohomora. I twist the knob, nothing.

"C'mon," I try once more, I repeat the incantation in my head but it's simply not working. One more time. "Alohomora," I whisper and a satisfying click makes my heart jump. I slip inside and look around. Same as last time. Instead of going to his wardrobe, I go to his bedside table. There must be something of worth in there.

A picture. A single picture of Blaise, some blonde kid and a brunette boy. How extravagantly boring. The three of them look miserable, just staring into the camera. They move slightly but it's really only their hair from the wind. My eyes are drawn to the blonde boy, his eyes were a similar colour to mine. Light blue, almost grey, like the sky after rain.

"From a few years ago," I jump and stand up, picture clutched to my chest. "It was the last time all three of us were somewhat happy," he smiles lightly before wiping the emotion from his face.

"You don't look happy," I state, looking at the picture again to check if I'm missing something. Still the same depressing loop as before.

"Well, Lucius had a way of making people seem that way," he chuckles, I only stare at him. He stares back. His eyes were dark with swirls of light, similar to how coffe looks before you mix in the cream. They were terrifyingly beautiful.

"Are you going to ask how I got in?"

"No, I already know how."

"Did Adelaine tell you?" I look down at my hands, secretly hoping my newest acquaintance had not split my secret.