Artemis Hexley and the Circle of Khanna

Chapter 13: Lonely Hearts

January seemed to last an eternity. The weather was still bitterly cold, with icy breezes blowing sleet and hail across the grounds and the frozen lake, while a mist still hung over the tops of the trees in the Forbidden Forest, due to the lingering presence of the dementor patrol.

Inside the castle, the Christmas decorations had long been removed, leaving the walls bare. Despite this, the castle was filled with noise and movement, the day-to-day hustle and bustle of people finding their way to lessons, the library, Quidditch practice. Younger students were playing games in the courtyard, and older students were kissing in quiet corners, and teachers were docking house points and handing out detentions. Hogwarts was returning to a sort of normality.

Artemis hated it.

As she had predicted it would, the more her life took on its usual rhythm, the more profoundly she felt Rowan's absence. What she hadn't predicted, however, were the number of times she had almost forgotten about it, and had turned to tell her best friend something or to hear what Rowan had to say, and found nothing but an empty space beside her. Sometimes, when she was in the library, sitting in the Hufflepuff common room or walking through the corridors, she caught brief glimpses of Rowan's face among the groups of students, but when she looked closer, she found that it wasn't Rowan at all, but someone else entirely - someone who had her height, or her long black hair, or who wore glasses that caught little fragments of light.

Worse of all were the mornings. Despite her overwhelming tiredness, Artemis had been struggling to sleep, and always awoke while the light was still dim in the dormitory. Alanza was still sleeping in Rowan's bed, and in her barely awake state, Artemis found herself wondering whether it truly was Alanza there at all, and not Rowan, returned to her rightful place. But of course, it was not Rowan. It was Alanza, and Artemis was growing to resent Alanza more and more with each passing day, for the simple fact that she was there and Rowan was not.

It seemed as if - aside from Merula, who hated Alanza even more than Artemis - she was the only one to feel this way about Alanza. All of Artemis' professors were delighted by Alanza's work in class, the girls all wanted to be her friend, and most of the boys appeared to want to be more than just that. Penny and Tonks had warmed to her, welcoming her into the dormitory and including her in their conversations, and even Fergus liked her, purring happily whenever Alanza stroked him and spoke to him in Portuguese.

Artemis found herself longing for the brief periods of respite she had from being Alanza's unwilling babysitter, thanks to Charlie having agreed to help make Alanza feel welcome so that she wouldn't have to. While Charlie and Alanza were studying Herbology and Astronomy in the library, Artemis was able to be free of the Alanza-shaped shackles around her ankles. But with Penny busy helping catch Tonks up on the Potions syllabus and Chiara assisting Madam Pomfrey in the Hospital Wing, Artemis was usually left alone. It wasn't that she minded being alone, if anything, she wanted to be alone, but as soon as she was by herself, she found that it was harder to distract herself from the mass of emotions that were creeping ever closer to her, threatening to consume her entirely.

By the final week of January, it seemed to Artemis that she was the only one still actively missing Rowan. Everyone else appeared to have moved on, to be wrapped up in other things, be those things their schoolwork or the Apparition lessons that the sixth years had started taking that term (though Artemis had neglected to attend), or Quidditch, which Artemis no longer cared about, having - much to Skye Parkin's chagrin - quit the Hufflepuff team and given her position as Seeker to Ellie Hopper. There was also Valentine's Day quickly approaching, as Artemis was reminded one evening over dinner, when Professor Dumbledore cleared his throat loudly to make an announcement.

"I do so hate to disturb you all while you are eating," he told them, a small but playful smile on his face. "However, I do think that you will forgive my intrusion into your well-earned leisure time. It is my understanding that a not insignificant number of you are excited about the upcoming event that is Valentine's Day, and while this is not an occasion that the school has traditionally acknowledged, certain individuals have pushed the idea that this year we might break with tradition."