Silently, he's watching me
I knew it,but I keep it
I told myself,but I ignored it
I hold on,but he did not wait
Darkness and light swallowed me
But I did not hide and seek
He always see me,and I was there
I still have to keep it until one day I lost it
Tears flow,leaves fell down
My friend testified that day
I was broke,but he was cool
But it's okay,I said that...
Late nights no sleeps,
Insomia is always there with me
Does he think of me?
Cause he's always in my dream
I rejected him but it's for his own good
Am I selfish?
Yeah,I was a silent selfish loner person
But no one knows I was suffering silently
Suffering from anxiety and depression
I don't have someone to lean on but only him
I always prayed and he always hear me out
I was thankful to him always
He always gave me strength
He always gave me air to breathe
And he's been by my side always to guide me
That time it's hard
I talked with him under the mahogany tree
He have eye defects and mine was clear
He felt dizzy that time
And I catched him when he was about to fall on the ground
I saved him purposely
But in the end,I rejected his offer to accompany me
I walk away with my umbrella
I looked back but I felt it's strange
My heart is crying
It's totally bursting in tears
My mind was unclear,I was wondering
My heart beats faster ever but my feelings is not right
I knew one day I will regret
I knew one day I will be hurt
But I never expected that it will be so soon
He made a mistake but also a blessing in disguise
I know it was hard and it was real
I know he knew but I was afraid
A coward like me don't know how to love
What is real love?
I onced asked and my teacher answered
You will know it soon
And there I am, confident before
Not until I fell deeper into him
His eyes are giving me electric shock
His face is so hard to forget
He always made me uncomfortable
But on the other hand,I loved him
I onced love him,and it's undeniable
I onced secretly in love with him
But life is not fair and it will never be
I have no choice but to go on
I knew one day I'll be hurt
I would give chance to others
But I always give chance to others
I just realized it's too late
Maybe it's a part of me,no
He's only a part of me
They thought I was selfish,
I was really very hurt that time and no one knew
But what can I do?
Regretfully,I was really selfish
But who knows I was always alone
No one to lean on while I was sad
But I don't need to be sad anymore
I admit and accept the pain already
And I know he's also in pain like me
This is reality and we must face it far from each other
We must be like this because we can't be together
We must move on even far from each other
We must grew mature enough to redeem another chances in life
And it's wonderful to think about it,the unrevealed love story.
__________
"Four years hidden love and one year in suffering but still I can't forget even I moved on."_MyLittleTurnips
[This is real life that I experienced as a romance writer.]
