Art (rylex fanfic)

I Love You, Fuck You

Ryland flinches when he hears the jingle of keys near the front door. He jumps off the couch to open the door.

Ryland opens the door to Alex, attempting to find the right key for the door. Ryland almost cringed at how bad Alex smelled.

Alex looked up to Rylands stern expression, giving Ryland a big dopey smile, oblivious to Rylands anger.

"Hi Ry!"

Ryland examined Alex's face.
His eyes were bloodshot, tear stains on his cheeks, and a forced smile.

Alex realized how he looked and quickly wiped at the tear stains with his worn out sweatshirt sleeve.

"Man, I'm freezing my ass off." Alex said, stepping through the door and closing it behind him.

"Where were you?" Ryland deadpanned.

"The bar, I told you." Alex walked over to the couch trying to find a way to change the subject. Ryland followed and sat next to Alex.

"Until 1AM!? I texted you and called you never answered. What the fuck Alex?! I was worried you were fucking dead!"

Alex squirmed uncomfortably. "I'm sorry, I was distracted. Please stop yelling."

Ryland looked Alex dead in the eyes. "Distracted with what?!"

Alex flinched at the yelling. "Please stop yelling." Alex mumbled.

"Answer me Alex." Ryland spat.

"The TV."

"Alex stop fucking lying to me!"

"Why do you want to know? Why would it matter?"

Ryland went silent.

"Because I fucking love you, Alex."

Alex's heart dropped. His eyes went wide and he froze.

"Alex?" Ryland asked hesitantly.

Alex looked away and put his hand over his mouth as he silently cried.

"No you don't Ryland. Stop fucking lying to me."

"What are you talking about?"

"You don't love me."

"Why would I not?"

Alex took a shaky breath then hides his face in his big hands.

"You'll never love me the way I love you."

Silence flooded the room.

"Fuck you, Alex."

Alex removed his hands from his face.

"What?"

"I said 'Fuck you.' You make me feel all these weird feelings. You make me want to take care of you. You make me want to take care of myself. You make me feel so nervous to disappoint you. You make me happy. You make me bring my walls down. You make me want to never let you go. You make me want to spend the rest of my life with you. You make me want to touch you. You make me want to kiss you. You... you made me love again. So, you know, fuck you."

Alex tackled Ryland in a hug, lightly sobbing into his chest.

"I'm sorry I'm so bad at showing it but I love you. Please talk to me Lexi."

Alex looks up into Rylands eyes. Ryland can see the dark bags under his bloodshot eyes.
Alex quickly cups Rylands face with his hands and gives him a quick kiss.

"Is that ok?"

Ryland takes a second to process what happened, then repeated what Alex did.
Alex pulls Ryland in more to deepen the kiss.

Silence flooded the room once more as they both processed what just happened.

"I.. I think it's getting bad again." Alex mumbled going back to the hugging position they were in.

"What's getting bad again?"

"Everything."

Ryland hated to say it, but he completely understood. He had times in his depression where he couldn't even put it into words.

"How long have you felt like this?"

"To long."

"Why'd you never tell me?"

"I'm scared you'll leave."

Silence filled the room again.

"It hurts, Ry." Alex said with his voice breaking at the end.

Ryland hugged Alex tighter, as if protecting him from the world.

"It's so pathetic I can't even open up to you without being drunk or high."

"Your not pathetic Lexi."

"Yes, I am"

"No, your not."

"...there's so much I want to tell you, but I just... can't."

"You can tell me whenever and whatever you want to tell me. I'll always be here for you."

"Thank you, Ry."

Alex's cries went down into sniffles, then he fell asleep on top of Ryland, he fell asleep not long after.

I was reading the chapter after this I had wrote a few months ago, and things "escalated" a little too fast. I plan on rewriting it, sorry to my horny readers, but you will have it soon *wink wink*